


So We Play The Long Game

by Rachel_Lu



Series: The Long Game [1]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (1963), Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: 1950s, BAMF Rose Tyler, Denial, Denial of Feelings, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Falling In Love, Minor Violence, Preacher - Freeform, Preacher!Tenth Doctor, Tenderness, Tenth Doctor Era, Waiting, domestic living
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-05
Updated: 2016-08-23
Packaged: 2018-07-29 11:14:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 27,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7682341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rachel_Lu/pseuds/Rachel_Lu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor and Rose have to wait out the timing of a TARDIS part that only crops up every once in awhile. Of course, the Doctor is prepared to retrieve the part, but he isn't prepared for where they land... Or the roles they must play.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is a bit more domestic than others I've done, as I like focusing on the Doctor and Rose's relationship, but if all of a sudden aliens get thrown in... well... Don't be surprised, I suppose. Enjoy! :)
> 
> (For those wondering, a new chapter of He Is No Beast will be up tomorrow)

"What?" Rose raised her eyebrows at the Doctor.  He smiled sheepishly up at her, as though he hadn't been scuffing his foot and mumbling just moments before, prompting the aforementioned 'what?' via Rose Tyler. 

"I have some bad news."

"You said that already," she said, smiling, "And I said 'what'?"

The Doctor scratched the back of his neck and made the 'I'm concentrating very hard' face that Rose was oh-so-familiar with.  He had trouble looking at her and she wasn't sure why.  She kicked her feet and wedged her hands under her legs where she was sitting on the jump seat and waited for him to speak.

"We need a TARDIS part," She prompted him, hoping it would help him along.  "And we can only get it in one place."

"Yes," he said softly, "1950s America, and we have to stay there until I can find it."

"Is it hiding?" Rose asked, confused.

The Doctor laughed, a rich sound that never ceased to make her laugh too.  She arched her eyebrows, though, waiting for him to actually reply to her question.  

He seemed to sense this, finally, and grinned down at her.  "Well, it's hard to detect.  I have a machine for it, but it has to be 'ready for harvest'.  But, uh, we'll have to be undercover for a while until we can find it."

Rose nodded, as she was always up for the challenge.  "Okay," she said amiably, "So 1950s America, should I break out the Elvis dress again?" She smiled at him, tongue touching the back of her teeth.

"Uh, no," he said, though not unkindly. "We'll be in sort of a... Sleepy town... We're going to have to integrate into society."

Rose blinked.  "Okay."

"You know what?  I'm going to just pilot us there and talk to you about it later.  You'll figure it out, don't worry about it."

She frowned. "I'm worried, actually, now that you said that.  Did the TARDIS do that thing where she gives us identities?"

"Yes..." The Doctor said slowly.

Rose squinted up at the TARDIS ceiling.  "What did you do?" She asked accusingly.  The ship hummed happily in response, and Rose grinned a little despite herself. 

"She's given you the persona of a good Christian girl who was sent out as an intern... A temp or secretary I believe.  You and I will actually be living in the same building, thank goodness."

She narrowed her eyes at him.  "That's doable.  Now what did you pull from the job grab-bag, Doctor?"

He sighed heavily. "I'll be shadowing the pastor at the nearest church.  I'm supposed to be fresh from seminary."

She burst out laughing, and she really couldn't help it.  It was more than a funny thought, it was nearly ludicrous.  She doubled over laughing on her seat but not before she saw how deep pink the Doctor's cheeks had stained.  

"I'm sorry," she said, gasping for air, "But you? A  pastor?  In a sleepy American town? Oh, I cannot _wait_ to see this," she finally calmed enough to throw him an exuberant wink. "Don't let any of those town girls tempt you away from God, now."

He groaned, "I hate you," he told his time ship.

"None of that now, you'll hurt her feelings," Rose said, stepping up to pat the Doctor on the arm just before he threw the final switch.  "We'll be in the same building, yeah?  So you won't...  I dunno.  Abandon me?"

"Rose," he sounded shocked at the very idea and turned to her.  "No, I'm going to stay as close to your side as I can.  Hell, our characters in this... Immersion are going to be the best of friends."

She laughed, feeling a bit more at ease. "Okay.  As long as you promise."

He drew her in for a quick hug.  "I do promise."

She wrapped her arms around his waist, making the quick hug last a bit longer.  He hummed happily and squeezed her tightly.  She released him after a few moments and stepped away, burying all her insecurities underneath her skin.  She looked away from him.  

"I'll go get dressed," she said, and he stood before her.  She looked up at him expectantly.  He laid a hand on her shoulder.  

"I promise," he said urgently.  "We'll even 'arrive' together! That's how we met, you and me, at the airport on the way across the pond.  Yeah?"

Rose giggled, unable to resist his charm and boyish attitude.  She nodded.  "Yeah, we arrived together.  Good idea."

"Alright, now go get changed.  The TARDIS will pick something out for both of us, but I figure I'll finish steering first."  He winked and she rolled her eyes before bolting from the console room.

When Rose got to the wardrobe room there was a suitcase, filled but with the lid open, on the floor.  She looked at it and moved to the rack that it was in front of.  There were fifties outfits that were very classic, like something she'd seen on an Earth nostalgia network on an American show like _Happy Days._

She decided on a green circle skirt with a green cardigan paired with it.  She would have to wear a white camisole under it, and she tied her hair up in a ponytail like she'd seen in the show, with a hair tie and then with a ribbon wrapped around it.  To top it off, she put on a sensible pair of black heels.  

She looked in the mirror and grinned at her reflection. Even if they were doing something as bland as waiting for a TARDIS part, it could still be fun.  She twirled experimentally and laughed before checking through her suitcase.  There were tons out outfits, and she had a feeling, as she dug deeper, that it was bigger on the inside.  She whistled lowly and smiled.  Everything was set, the TARDIS had even packed her own hairbrush and makeup. 

Closing the suitcase, she got to her feet and smoothed out her skirt before heading towards the console room, luggage in tow.  

The Doctor wasn't there when she reached the console room so she flounced over to the jump seat, fluffing her skirt before falling into the seat.  She crossed her legs and opened the magazine she'd been reading and waited for him, slowly getting lost in the gossip rags of the twenty first century.  The Doctor often picked on her for reading them, but Rose just rolled her eyes and read on.  

He finally showed up several minutes later and when she glanced up she almost laughed, but couldn't quite bring herself to.  He looked good.  Instead of his suit, he wore a jumper with a dress shirt and tie underneath, and a pair of dark wash jeans.  To her surprise, he had a suitcase as well. 

She snapped her mouth shut in embarrassment, but was less embarrassed when she saw that he had just clicked his jaw shut and looked away from her.  Her cheeks warmed and she smiled to herself. 

"So we're here?" She asked, setting her magazine aside and getting to her feet.  

His gaze traveled up her slowly before he blinked harshly, bringing himself back to the present, and nodded.  "Yep!  Right outside is the fifties."  

She wanted to hold his hand, she always did, but this time she knew they probably shouldn't be seen like that together, especially if he was supposed to 'straight out of seminary'.  

He smiled at her and led her out of the TARDIS to what appeared to be a bus stop.  Rose looked around.  The TARDIS sat on the edge of a small field, next to a barn. She squinted at it and turned back to the Doctor.

"Alright, quick question: how is this hiding the TARDIS until we can get the part?"

The Doctor looked at the TARDIS and back to Rose, repeating her actions on her.  "Well, there's a perception filter on it.  We can only see if because we're looking for it.  We know what it is and how to find it."

"Oh, so no one else will find it?"

"No," The Doctor said with absolute certainty, "Not unless we show one exactly where it is, which we won't.  There's no need to do that."

She didn't know why he was emphasizing that so hard, so she cocked an eyebrow at him and regarded him carefully. He simply shrugged and nodded for her to follow him.  It seemed the bus stop that the TARDIS had landed by was next to the sleepy town they were going to be staying in. 

They walked from the bus stop past the field and they could see most of the town from there.  It was really very tiny and rural, looking like a small farm town.  At what appeared to be the edge of the town was a church, and Rose nudged her shoulder against the Doctor's and he rolled his eyes at her.

It seemed to be that people knew that they were coming, as a rather robust woman ran out towards them.  "Hello, hello!" She said, her voice heavy with an American accent.  "You must be Doctor John Smith."

"I just go by the Doctor," he said kindly.

"And you're the new secretary?" The woman asked, "Rose Tyler?"

Rose nodded, plastering a smile on her face.  "Yes, that's me!  Where will I be working?"

"You'll be working as a secretary for one of the town's lawyers," the woman replied, "We have two.  Oh, how rude of me!  I'm Louise Marker, it's lovely to meet you."  She scrunched her eyebrows at them.  "Did you come in together?"

"Oh, we met on the plane," the Doctor lied easily, rocking back on his heels.  "Miss Tyler is absolutely lovely conversation, I think we'll be good friends," he said happily, smiling at Rose.  She couldn't help but grin back.

"Yeah, seems that not many people are coming here from London, so we were seated next to each other, and we just ended up chatting for a lot of the way."  She wrung her hands and then reached for the handle on the suitcase.  "We found out we're living in the same building." 

That seemed to make Louise jump a little.  "Oh!  You're right!  You must be so tired, come on, come on." 

She led them through the town, and the sun was setting, so no one was out and about.  Rose wondered if Louise had been assigned to wait for their arrival or something similar.  They approached one of the largest buildings in the town within about ten minutes, and they were informed that it was a bed and breakfast that was more 'long term'.

"I don't own the place, but I do have permission to show you to your rooms."  She peered at her watch. "And I can grab you dinner, if you'd like."

"That's alright, we ate on the plane," the Doctor said easily, smiling widely at Louise.  

"Oh, if you're sure," Louise said, and led them up the stairs.  "You're both on this floor, so I'll go ahead and drop Rose off first I suppose.  I know how ladies need a bit more time before turning in," she smiled and Rose grinned back. 

The room had an en suite, so Rose had an idea that this house was built to be a bed and breakfast.  She peered in and turned back to Louise.  "Will we meet our hosts tomorrow?" She asked politely.

Louise nodded. "Of course.  They'll bring up breakfast for both of you, you'll meet them then."

"Alright, you have a lovely night," Rose said, trying to figure out the right thing to say.  "And you, Doctor.  I hope to see you in the morning."

The Doctor winked at her.  "Of course, Miss Tyler.  Perhaps I'll walk you to your temping job before heading to the church."

"That's a great idea!" Louise said enthusiastically. "The two of you must have so much in common.  Then you can meet everyone along the way."

Rose wasn't too terribly excited to 'meet everyone' but it didn't seem that that was an option.  She laced her fingers together in front of her and nodded happily.  "Sure.  You all, uh, have a nice night," she watched the Doctor for a moment longer before dragging her suitcase in the room with her, shutting the door, and leaning back against it with her face in her hands. This was going to be a long trip. 

The Doctor was led to his room by a chatty Louise, who looked back at him and grinned when they reached his door.  "I think she has a crush on you," she said excitedly.

He blinked. "No, no, she can't possibly... fancy me."

Louise giggled like a schoolgirl finding out her best friend had a new playground boyfriend.  "Oh, of course," she said sarcastically.  "I think the two of you should talk more."

Not wanting to deter her from speaking to him, the Doctor forced a smile. "Well, she's lovely company.  Goodnight, Ms. Marker."

"Goodnight, Doctor."

He went into his room and his smile slipped from his face.  Already someone thought Rose fancied him.  Everyone always thought they were a couple. He fell back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling without bothering to unpack.

This was going to be a long trip.


	2. Chapter 2

It was odd to sleep in a room without the Doctor when they were somewhere other than the TARDIS. Usually, he insisted that they be together, but of course, with him coming out of fake seminary, he needed to keep a distance between them.  They could be close, but there were certain things that she certainly could not do.  Such as seek him out for comfort during the night. 

That comfort was never the kind of comfort that Jackie thought that Rose was getting from the Doctor, no matter what Rose wished it was.  On occasion, when things had gotten too hard for either of them, they would crawl into bed with the other, and the person's weight on the mattress next to them would never be questioned. 

But here, in a new place, where she didn't know a lot about what was happening, and she didn't know anything... It made her anxious.  She had tossed and turned for a lot of the night before falling completely asleep out of exhaustion alone.  She woke up in a haze, wishing she had something familiar to hold onto, and wishing that that familiar thing was the Doctor.  But he wasn't there.  She would try to stay as close to him as she could during this little adventure, because her biggest fear was that this would not stay peaceful.

Rose remembered the sense of propriety that came along with the fifties and made sure to get up and get dressed before their hosts came to bring her her breakfast.  She was just tying the purple ribbon into her hair as a knock sounded on the door. 

She answered the door with a pleasant smile on her face.  "Hello, I'm Rose Tyler," she said. 

A happy looking couple stood before her, grinning back.  They looked like the classic American couple, and had kind eyes. The woman held a tray in her hands and held it out for Rose. 

"My name is Allison Cray, this is my husband Robert," she said by way of introduction.  "We were told that the pastor wanted to walk you to your job, so we reminded him where you're staying.  I hope you're not upset."

Rose blinked.  "No, of course not.  He can meet me whenever he likes," she smiled forcefully. "I'll be fine, thank you."

She noticed Robert didn't say a word, and even as Allison bid her goodbye, he said nothing, merely watched her as he walked away.  She shut and locked the door, his look unnerving her enough that she didn't want him to have access to her room. She wondered if it was he or his wife who kept the keys. 

The breakfast was hearty and made her stomach turn.  Pancakes, eggs, toast, and bacon.  She ate a piece of toast, a pancake, and some eggs, and could barely get down a strip of bacon before she felt stuffed. 

Not long after that she heard a knock at her door.  Deciding to be cautious, she peeked around the door.  She saw the Doctor looking at her curiously and blew out a sigh of relief.  "Hello," she said, opening the door all the way.

He cocked an eyebrow in concern.  "You into a habit of peeking around doors now?" He asked cheerfully. 

She chuckled and shook her head.  "Nevermind.  You here to walk me to work?" 

"Yes I am," he turned towards the hallway and stuck out his arm for her.  "Shall we?"

She threaded her arm through his and smiled up at him.  "Of course."

They walked out of the bread and breakfast after asking for directions to Rose's new workplace.   Rose swung around her purple skirt as the Doctor led her out and he laughed at her, tugging her along.

"Have you set up the thing to look for the TARDIS part yet?" Rose asked lowly as they headed down towards the other end of town.

"Yes, and it will continue to scan and alert my sonic when updates are made," he said.  A dimple set into his cheek. "I will admit that I'm not keen on the idea of being set apart from you."

She nudged her shoulder against his.  "Did you worry about me all night, Doctor?"

He turned to her. "Yes."

She smiled and shrugged.  "Well, good, a girl likes to be worried about."

The Doctor blushed red and looked away from her. It made her smile. Sometimes he was so dreadfully innocent that she couldn't help but tease him, and sometimes he flirted with her so shamelessly that she thought maybe he'd shove her up against a wall and snog her. 

But, frustratingly, he never did, and she was left to sit in her own tension, feeling shocked and like she should be the one to make the first move.  She got away from that thought as quickly as she could, though.  

People nodded at them in greeting as they passed as though they knew them.  Rose supposed that in a town this small it made sense for that to be something that happened.  Soon enough, she'd know everyone here, she just had a feeling, she supposed.  

Of course, she was afraid that the more immersed she grew in the culture, the more the Doctor would want to run.  She didn't want him to run, at least not without her.  It appeared that right now he was not going to run at all.

"You get to meet with a lawyer," The Doctor said cheerfully.  "Isn't that nice?"

She furrowed her brows.  "Yeah, I guess.  And I get to type for him the whole time, it looks like." She wrinkled her nose, "Do people want anything else for secretaries?"

The Doctor blushed.  "Rose."

She blinked. "Oh, no, that's not what I meant, Doctor, and this is the fifties, if you recall."

"Yes but men are still men and women are still women," the Doctor said, and Rose thought that that was perhaps the most profound thing that he had ever said. 

She made sure to look over at him.  "I'll be careful," she promised quietly.  "He won't be getting anything from me."

If she didn't know any better, she'd think that she heard the Doctor let out a sigh of relief, or something of the sort.  She squeezed his arm and he walked her towards the lawyer's office.  

It was a little red building with a sign above the door that read "Taylor Law Firm."  The Doctor insisted that he was going to walk in there with her, just to scope the place out. Rose knew better than to argue, and in all honestly, didn't want to argue at all.  They walked straight in and the Doctor let Rose's arm go but still stood very close to her.  He told himself it was for security purposes, to keep her safe.  In reality, he was afraid that the lawyer would be attractive, and Rose would grow fond of him, and he would be forced to leave her behind. 

And there were many, many reasons why he could not leave her behind. 

When they walked in, a man with slicked back blond hair emerged from a back office.  The Doctor looked up at the bell over the door.  Ah.  Warning to anyone inside that there would be another person entering. He would certainly keep that in mind.  

"You must be Rose Tyler." The man smiled broadly, "I'm Allen Taylor, the owner and lawyer in said law firm we stand in. It's very nice to meet you."

He stepped forward and took Rose's hand, not shaking it, just holding it.  The Doctor felt an unexplained flare of jealousy.  That hand was _his_ to hold.

Rose smiled politely and dipped her head in greeting, the perfect picture of grace. "It's nice to meet you too," she replied, "And what sort of work will I be doing, exactly?  Besides typing away on that typewriter there."

She gestured to the desk in front of what appeared to be Mr. Taylor's office.  Mr. Taylor let out a bark of laughter and nodded.

"Yes, you will be taking dictations for me as well as running errands and dealing with clients." He said, smiling kindly at her.  He then turned to the Doctor, a bit of confusion written on his face.  "I'm sorry, who are you?"

The Doctor cleared his throat and stood up a little taller, his chest puffing out.  "I'm the Doctor, also known as John Smith. I'm shadowing the pastor here.  I'm a very good friend of Rose's."

Mr. Taylor seemed very surprised.  "Oh, I didn't think that you knew each other."

"We do," Rose said.

"I'll be picking her up at six tonight," the Doctor said firmly.  

"Oh, of course," Mr. Taylor said, clasping his hands together in front of himself.  "I think it makes sense that the both of you would walk home together."

Rose found herself growing more and more confused with each interaction between the two men. The Doctor had not been this possessive of her since Captain Jack had come aboard, and he hadn't ever in this carnation of himself.  

She was confused... And a little flustered.  It was nice, all the attention, and she looked over at him, offering a reassuring smile.  He grinned back at her, seeming to get that she was accepting his pushing away of this other man.  Oh, she was in full support of that decision.

"I'll see you tonight," he said, and he took her hand, as Mr. Taylor had done ( _his_ hand, not Mr. Taylor's, that dainty little hand belonged to _him)_ and squeezed it lightly. 

"Okay, see you," she smiled, "I hope you have a nice day at the church."

The Doctor smiled.  "A man of God's work is never done, but I'll start it today."

"How admirable," she said, smiling.

He winked at her and dropped her hand before walking out of the law firm. Rose watched him go.  She'd been expecting a hug, and she knew that that was completely ridiculous.  There was no reason for him to hug her, especially in the 1950s.  She wrung her hands and turned to Mr. Taylor.  

She tilted her shoulder up towards her ear and smiled.  "Yeah, he's a lot."

Mr. Taylor returned her smile.  "He seems to care for you quite alot."

"Oh.  He does," she replied. "So, what can I do for you?"

"I have some handwritten notes on a case I'm working on.  Armed robbery in the next county over.  I need you to type them up if you could."  He turned back towards his office. "It's been a long time since I had a secretary.  You'll be invaluable."

She nodded. "Of course.  How far away is the next county over?  This pace is so small."

"It's about two miles away," Mr. Taylor let her know.  "You might have to go to court with me, though, if I need you for something. I can't promise that you won't have to.  But it would only ever be day trips, nothing to upset your Doctor."

"Oh, he's not mine," Rose said, coloring deeply at the mere notion.

Mr. Taylor grinned. "Well, he at least, seems to think otherwise.  Either way, he doesn't have to worry about me."

"Of course not.  Well, I'm sorry I can't chat with you more, but I'll speak to you in a couple hours."

"Okay.  Thanks," Rose said, looking over at the desk which she now knew was hers.  "See you."

Mr. Taylor exited, leaving the door cracked open only slightly so that she could come get him if she needed to.  Rose sat at her desk and looked down at the typewriter.  She began typing the stack of notes slowly, making sure not to make any mistakes.  When she did any sort of busy work on the TARDIS (Which was not very often, unless the Doctor needed something stupid) she listened to music, so she found herself growing restless without the sound.  There wasn't even anyone to talk to.  

She trudged on though, not wanting to do anything wrong and have to do it over.  She also wanted to make a good first impression on her boss.  She wondered what the Doctor was up to at that moment. 

The Doctor walked to the church, his hands clenched at his sides.  This was ridiculous.  She was always coming home with him, would always come home with him, and he knew that.  But this, these stupid domestics, was the only thing that was messing his brain up.

He shook his head as he approached the church.  Maybe he just needed to talk to a pastor about something that was _not_ Rose Tyler.

He wouldn't be a minute late to pick her up that night, though.  He didn't want her alone for an extra minute with that man.

Though he still couldn't put a finger on why.


	3. Chapter 3

After the Doctor left Rose, he continued on towards the church.   He tried to shove her out of his mind, but the idea of her being with that lawyer for the whole day.  He didn't know what kind of man he was.  He could be seducing Rose right at this moment. 

Though, at the moments when the Doctor had been in the man's office, he appeared to think that he and Rose were an item. The Doctor's mind warred with that notion.  It was one that pleased him greatly, but also one that he wasn't willing to admit he wanted. 

Or, perhaps it wasn't even that.  Maybe it was just that the Time Lords would have frowned upon him for it, and he wanted their approval even in their death. 'It' of course being the acceptance of the love of Rose Tyler. He frowned.  That was assuming she loved him at all, which was an incredibly wild thing to assume. 

He scrubbed his hands over his face.  He hoped the TARDIS part would hurry up because he did not want to be in this cesspool of domestic behavior for long, if he could help it.  It was already doing things with his mind.  

The church was classical, the epitome of class and simplicity in the 1950s.  There were two large wood double doors, one of which was propped open, either to allow invitation or because the church had no air conditioning.  Some of the windows were stained glass, but some of them were plain, functioning only to let the church fill with light.  The Doctor stepped inside, feeling out of place in such an establishment.  

"Hello?" He called out, his voice echoing among the sanctuary.  It was a little baptist church, with red carpeting and wooden pews that were sure to make one's bum hurt after a service, even with the light cushioning in it.  At the front of the church there was a low stage with a podium and a piano and other instruments, and a cross up in the back against the far wall.

"Hello?" The Doctor called out again.  "This is Doctor John Smith, but you can call me the Doctor.  Unless you don't want to call me 'Pastor Doctor' which would be perfectly understandable."

He heard a light laugh and a man stepped out from a hallway to the left of the stage that the Doctor hadn't seen.  The man had a suit on, with black dress shoes, and his black hair was slicked.  He stepped forward towards the Doctor. 

"I'll call you the Doctor if that's what you prefer," the man said, "You won't be preaching while you're in town, so you won't have a problem at all."  He smiled warmly.  "I'm Pastor Rick Moon.  You'll be seeing quite a lot of me, I'm afraid."

The Doctor laughed and stepped forward to shake the other man's hand.  "Thank you.  I have to admit, I'm not certain on how we'll be filling the time."

"Well, today I'd like to show you around the church.  The ins and outs are a little different than you think, I can promise you that."  Pastor Rick smiled. "Do you know anyone in town?" 

"Yes," the Doctor replied quickly.  "The lawyer's new temp, Rose Tyler.  We're both from London, we've.... Spoken."

Pastor Rick grinned. "I'm glad you know someone.  Will she be attending services?"

"Yes," The Doctor said without thinking, sparing a guilty thought that Rose would have to sit through services every week, but maybe she could sit next to him and then it wouldn't be a problem.  That lawyer wouldn't be a problem.  Besides, it was likely that everybody else in the town went to church, and if Rose didn't, she would stand out in a bad way. 

"Good. It wouldn't serve you well to get involved with a woman who was not in the faith."

"No, I suppose not," he rubbed that back of his neck, "But I don't expect to get... Involved with Miss Tyler."

The pastor grinned.  "Well, we shall see, Doctor," he said in an ominous sort of way.  "Now, come with me, I want to show you around."

The Doctor decided not to be bored.  He was going to treat this as a new adventure, even if he didn't really want to. His mind continued to stubbornly wander to Rose, and as they exited the sanctuary, he blurted out, "I promised Miss Tyler I would walk her home at six.  Is that alright?"

"Of course," Pastor Rick said, and the Doctor could hear the smile in his voice, which made him blush a little bit again.  Everyone always thought they were a couple. 

The church seemed a bit cramped compared to his bigger on the inside house.  There were stairs but they were cramped, the red carpeting buckling a little bit with age.  The Doctor made certain to be careful as they walked up the stairs, not tripping over his feet even once.  

When they made it to the top, he gestured out to his left.  "That is where all the music is kept for Sunday worship.  You won't need any of that."

The tour was longer than expected, but luckily, the Doctor was able to file it all away in his massive Time Lord brain.  Pastor Rick asked him about seminary and the Doctor seamlessly made up lies, only sparing half a thought to the fact that he was lying in a church.  

"And you will have an office here," the Pastor said finally, looping around a corner in the upstairs to a closed door.  He opened the door and gestured inside.  The Doctor entered. It was actually quite spacious, considering.  There was a bookshelf and a desk and a mini fridge.  There was a window behind the desk, and the Doctor nodded approvingly. 

"It's very nice.  Thank you."

"People might come back to speak to you, be sure that people know they can approach you," Pastor Rick said, "I'll be sure to tell them on Sunday.  Perhaps Miss Tyler could visit you as well, should the occasion call for it, and appropriately of course."

The Doctor squinted and looked up at the ceiling.  "Sir, Rose and I aren't-"

"Time will tell, Doctor," the Pastor said, "Only God knows our future."

The Doctor nodded a little dejectedly. It was too bad that he _did_ know, and he knew that he would never be with Rose. 

"You can get settled in here, look around in the drawers.  I'll order us a pizza. It's really a newfangled thing, it's great." He beamed and the Doctor smiled and nodded, trying to pretend that it was _such_ a surprising thing that he could order a pizza and that the TARDIS didn't cook up a pizza for Rose when she so much as thought about it. 

"Is there anything you need me to do, while I'm here?" The Doctor asked, rocking back on his heels. He wanted to be helpful after all. 

"No, I shouldn't think so," the pastor said, "If there's something you want to read or organize, this is your space, you can do whatever you want."  He left and the Doctor stood, feeling quite awkward with the situation.

With the time they'd been placed in, it wasn't even like he could've gotten a mobile so he could call Rose. However, he did have a landline telephone on the desk.  He shook his head to himself.  No, he was not to call her.  He walked to the bookshelf and started looking through the hardcover volumes. 

****

Rose's fingers hurt. She'd been typing all morning, and she'd not eaten lunch, but to be fair, neither had Mr. Taylor. So she continued to type up all the things that he'd left for her, the chicken scratch turning into neatly typed words.  She cracked her knuckles and sat back in her chair for a moment before looking over at the clock. Two O' clock. 

Mr. Taylor poked his head out from his office and regarded her carefully.  "Your friend is picking you up at six, right?" 

Rose nodded.  "Yeah, and he's usually on time."  She almost winced with the fib, because that was most certainly one of the biggest fibs she had ever told.

"Alright.  Could you do me a favor?"

She didn't see how she had a choice, so she nodded. "Sure.  What do you need me to do?"

He handed her a set of keys and she took them with a surprised look on her face.  "What?  Sorry, sir, but what?"

Mr. Taylor laughed, "I need you to stop off at my house and pick up my extra briefcase."

He gave her the address and Rose found herself getting angrier and angrier with have passing moment. he expected her to get up and go to his house, without a car, and retrieve something he had forgotten.  Well, 1950s America, she reminded herself, and continued to get up and walk straight out the door. 

A few cars passed by, but it wasn't like she could hail a taxi or anything, so she sighed and asked somebody in a dollar store for directions. She found her way and found that he lived in one of the biggest houses in the neighborhood.  

She didn't' know where to look for it, but his house was immaculate for being a mad. She looked around for awhile, but finally had to go upstairs into his bedroom to find the thing. She narrowed her eyes at the briefcase, which sat on the bed.  Had he planned this?  Why did she feel like every man in this town was trying to pull her?  She scratched the back of her neck and sighed.  Were there not enough women around? 

It was a nice room, but she instantly compared it to the Doctor's room in her head.  He was nea, but certain parts of his room were artfully messy.  Mr. Taylor's room, however, was immaculate, not a thread on the duvet out of place.  She wrinkled her nose, feeling as though his room belonged in a museum and not a town. 

How did someone forget a briefcase on a bed?  She thought to herself as she picked it up roughly and stomped back down the stairs. This was the most ridiculous errand that she had ever been sent on and she was borderline offended by it.  She slammed the door to his house and locked it before heading back to the office. 

She took her time, letting the fresh air brush over her face. It was refreshing, to be outside after such a long day of being cramped in a chair.  As stupid as the errand was, she was glad she had it for something to do, and it let her stretch her legs. 

When she arrived at the office again, there were more notes on her desk. She knocked on Mr. Taylor's door and ignored the notes all by themselves. 

"Oh, thanks!" Mr. Taylor grinned, grabbing the briefcase from her.  "That's really great of you, Rose, thanks."

"Yeah, sure," she said, lifting a shoulder. 

"Well, I think you'll notice that I've left you a couple more notes, so if you could get on that, that would be great."

Rose forced a smile. "Sure," She said through clenched teeth, and Mr. Taylor offered her another winning smile before slamming the door. 

Rose grumbled to herself and threw herself into her chair, listening to it creak painfully and wishing it would break and wondering if workers compensation had been invented yet.  She set her fingers on the keys and began typing again.  

The Doctor, on the other hand, had a very excellent day, and it was five thirty when he looked at the clock and realized he needed to be going rather soon-ish. 

"Alright," The Doctor said, "Well, Pastor Rick, I'm really glad I enjoy your company, seeing as we'll be spending a lot of time together now," he grinned.  "What time would you need me here tomorrow?"

"I have a couple's counseling I've asked if you can sit in on," the Pastor replied, "It begins at one, so you'll need to get here then," he smiled, "I'm certainly glad you're not boring, Doctor, many new pastors are.  You'll be fine." 

"Thank you," The Doctor smiled. "Goodbye!" 

The pastor called his goodbye back and the Doctor walked from the building to go retrieve Rose.  Somewhere along the road he decided to take her out for dinner that night.


	4. Chapter 4

The Doctor burst into Mr. Taylor's office at Six o' clock sharp. Rose looked up from her desk in alarm, and then she grinned in relief.  "Hi," she said, standing.

He looked her over.  Her hair was mussed but still in its ponytail, and she looked exhausted.  he furrowed his brows at her.  "Your hair," he said, at a loss to say anything else. 

She reached up and touched it, then giggled before crossing to him and trowing her arms around his neck.  He clutched her about the waist, trying not to let his brain jump to any of the wild conclusions that it was currently forming. 

"Been touching it a lot, out of frustration, I guess," she whispered, "This man is relentless, giving me paper after paper to type up.  My hands ache."

He felt his hearts lurch. She was here because of him, because of a part his _bloody_ ship needed, and somehow, it had put her in pain.  He squeezed her tighter, his face in her hair.  "I'm sorry," he said softly.  

She patted his upper back with her lower hand. "S'okay," she assured him, and pulled back to look him in the face.  "I'll probably be sorted by tomorrow.  But listen to this."  She pulled away from him entirely, much to his dismay and cracked her knuckles.  He winced. 

"That's so bad for you," he scolded, and she shrugged. 

"Can't do anything else about it," she said.

"I'll give you a hand massage later if you don't do that again," he said, his voice serious.

She regarded him carefully, her mirth gone. "What's wrong?" She asked. 

He shook his head. "I'm fine. The pastor... He's actually very nice, and I told him that you'd come to church every Sunday."

She laughed.  "Okay," she said, "Do I get to sit next to you?"

"Of course," he said hastily.  "Tell your boss we're out of here, okay?" 

She shook her head, "You must be real tired or something, Doctor, you're acting really weird."  She walked to Mr. Taylor's office and knocked once before sticking her head in. 

"Yes?" He asked, his voice smooth and, the Doctor's blood boiled to realize, seductive.  

"The Doctor's here, we're gonna go. What time do you need me tomorrow?"

"I won't need you until three, but feel free to come early if you'd like," he said. 

"Three it is!  See you then," she shut the door and came back over to the Doctor.  He offered his arm to her and she threaded hers through it, grinning up at him. 

"He's trying to pull you," the Doctor remarked as they left the building.

Rose wrinkled her nose. "I rather thought that myself.  He sent me back to his house for his briefcase, and when I got there, it was just sat on his bed.  How do you forget anything that's sat on your bed?"

"You don't," the Doctor replied bluntly.

"Exactly," she said in a chipper voice.  "I don't think it was exactly the most subtle way he could've managed it."

"You're already trying to date someone in a time that's over fifty years before yours?" The Doctor asked, trying to sound disinterested. 

Rose laughed and leaned her head against his shoulder, "You're ridiculous," she said, "No, I'm not trying to date anybody here. I'm not stupid."

"I didn't think you were stupid," he said, "You're human, and he's an attractive man, and-"

" _God,_ Doctor, I don't know why you always think I'm going to leave you. You think I'll swan off with the next person who comes along, but I'm not.  Got it?" She looked up at him, and he felt the corners of his eyes crinkle in a smile.  

"Got it."

"Good."

"Now, then, how about we go out for dinner?"  He said, trying to lighten the mood, trying to change the subject. Trying, painfully, to deflect from the fact that he had been desperate and wanted her to stay with him.  

She let him, this time, and squeezed his arm. "Can we afford that?" She asked teasingly.

"The TARDIS gave me some American money," he replied easily.  "Of course."

"Of course."  She said, mimicking his tone.  "Well, where's to eat around here?"

The Doctor shrugged.  "I noticed a burger restaurant while we were walking up.  Let's go there?"

"Okay," She agreed, "Very American."

"Very."

It was _violently_ American, as it turned out.  It had a baby blue storefront with a yellow and pink neon sign that wrote "Andy's" vertically down it.  It was every picture Rose had seen of the fifties come to life.  She smiled and they entered.  The place was bustling with activity, people dancing next to the jukebox and several booths filled with people of all ages.  The Doctor pulled Rose along to a corner booth and gestured for her to get in across from him.  once they were seated a waitress zipped over to them and laid menus in front of them, babbling about specials.  

When she left, Rose blinked at the menu, opening it before looking back at the Doctor. "So how was your day?" She asked, leaning on the table.

His hearts pounded in his chest. this was exactly the sort of thing that he hated and feared.  She sat across from him, so close to a 'girlfriend' status, smiling at him and asking about his day went shadowing a pastor at a church. That wasn't right.  He struggled internally and started breathing heavily, looking to her.

She looked completely calm, like she could tell he was freaking out but had also expected such a thing.  She waited patiently for his response and cocked her head before looking back down at the menu for another few moments. 

"It was good," he struggled to say, "The pastor's name is Rick Moon.  He's a nice man and gave me an office and said that he wanted me to sit in on counseling tomorrow."

"Sounds awful," she said, grinning at him. 

He smiled back at her, unable to refuse her when she looked at him like that.  "Well, it might be.  What did you do all day?"

"Typed," she said, looking down at her menu.  "It was really awful. I couldn't even understand anything that was there, really.  Big lawyer-talk. He's terribly boring really."

"Most lawyers are," the Doctor said lamely, "That's why they seek affairs with their secretaries," he looked at her pointedly.

Rose rolled her eyes. "You know what, that's absolutely ridiculous," she said, "I'm not nearly pretty enough for that, not to mention that it's not something I would ever do.  You don't need to worry about me, Doctor."

"Well, I'm going to anyway," he replied.  "I want you to be careful.  I think it may have been a mistake coming here."

"We need that TARDIS part," she reminded him, "How does it generate anyway?" She asked, "Why do we have to wait?"

The Doctor leaned on his elbow and squinted up at the ceiling.  "It's made organically, it'll probably pop up in an empty field by the town.  On Gallifrey you could get it anywhere, but it's a more rare item here on Earth.  It puffs up every now and then and now we know that it's going to be produced around this time."

"That's interesting," she said, "And none of us even know it's here."

He nodded.  "Yep.  Not even dangerous."  He looked at his menu.  "What do you think you want?" he asked casually.

She groaned, "The biggest meal ever.  I'm starving, I didn't eat lunch."

The Doctor's eyes nearly popped out of his head. "Are you telling me that stodgy old lawyer didn't feed you?"

Rose laughed. "not sure you have any place to be calling anybody old," she teased, "But no, he didn't.  Guess he forgot about it."

"I'm sure he ate," the Doctor grumbled.  

Rose reached over and patted his hand.  "Don't worry about it," she said softly, "it's not that big of a deal."

The Doctor snapped his eyes up to hers. "Rose, you could've passed out. Have you at least had any water?"

She laughed and nodded, "A little.  Don't worry so much, I'm alright."

The Doctor flagged the waitress over and ordered them both water before Rose got the 'biggest burger you have with a side of fries' and the Doctor ordered the same.  Before the waitress could leave, Rose requested two chocolate shakes and smiled over at the Doctor.  "They're a staple in this time," she said, "So they'd better be good."

He smiled.  "Here's hoping."

When their food arrived, the conversation slowed.  The Doctor accidentally kicked Rose's leg several times out of nervousness and she finally kicked him back.  The tension that the Doctor had thrown up between them quickly diminished as they nudged each other under the table, giggling. 

"Let me eat," Rose said finally, a smile in her voice, trailing her foot down his leg.  He shivered and went back to his food, hoping to forget how lovely she looked when she was smiling like that. She was beautiful, and the deeper they fell into domestics, the deeper he fell into her. 

Rose remarked that the milkshake was really wonderful and the Doctor reluctantly agreed. He hadn't expected to like something from Earth so much, and almost didn't want to.  After they ate, Rose started dancing a little in her seat to the jukebox music. 

"Let's dance," she blurted out, getting to her feet.

"What?" The Doctor sputtered, looking up at her.  

She held her hand out to him as he had done to her so many times before and wiggled her fingers. "You know how to, I know you do."

He looked at all the young people dancing about. "Rose, I don't know, I'm supposed to be the pastor, I-"

"I'm not asking you to shag me on the dance floor," she replied sharply, furrowing her brows at him.  "Come on, now, hop to."

"Rose..."  His voice had a hint of warning and Rose could sense it.  She knew him much better than he had thought she did.  She was his best mate, and she read right through him, of course she did. 

She finally dropped her hand, the weight of the rejection settling over her.  The excitement practically drained out of her.  "Fine," she said softly, suddenly not able to look him in the eyes, "It was silly, I don't know."  She picked up her little handbag and smiled tightly at him.  "I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?  Maybe before you go to the church or something." 

So she still wanted to see him, which was reassuring.  He felt selfish for finding that to be so reassuring.  "Rose, wait-"

"No, you don't have to explain yourself to me, Doctor, I'm not going to make you do something you don't want to do, I just thought that... Never mind," she started for the door and the Doctor leaned back in his seat before shooting up to go after her, throwing money on the table for the waitress. 

She was already walking down the street and someone had already wolf whistled at her.   So, it was the late crowd, the Doctor supposed.  He reached out for her arm and turned her around.  

"You can't take this personally, Rose," he said anxiously, "It's just that I'm supposed to be a pastor and-"

"Don't," she said, her voice turned sour.  "Wait for your damn part, and I'll wait with you, you know I will.  But let me go."  She looked at his hand, gripping her arm, in a pointed sort of way. 

He realized that the way he was holding her would leave a mark and he ripped his hand away from her, staring down at his palm. She rubbed her upper arm.  They stared at each other in shock, wondering how things had come to a head so quickly 

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

She shook her head, her mouth set in a thin line.  She wasn't angry, the Doctor realized, she was trying not to cry.  She inhaled deeply and said softly, "I just thought we could have some fun, that's all.  The way you used to be.  You used to be fine being seen with me, and now you just stay away from me, hold me at arm's length.  And that's _fine,_ but put the boundaries where I can understand.  Please." 

"Rose-"

"Goodnight," she said.

"We're going to the same place," he objected. 

"You obviously don't want to be seen with me," she replied.

"I also don't want you to walk alone," he said.

She nodded, her shoulders slumping, and turned to walk towards the house they were staying in.  He walked next to her, wishing he could reach out and hold her hand, but he couldn't, not now.  He kicked himself. he should've danced with her.  

When they reached the house, Rose grinned warmly at their hosts and he had to practically chase her up the stairs to stay next to her. 

"I _will_ see you tomorrow?" He asked, suddenly unsure.

"Yes," she replied.  And she disappeared into her room, leaving him alone in the hallway.


	5. Chapter 5

The Doctor lay awake all night, and for once it wasn't because he didn't need sleep, because honestly, sleep would have been preferable after a row with Rose, to forget all that had happened.  He hadn't wanted to hurt her.  He was afraid that if he touched her, if he laid a hand on her waist to guide her in a dance, all his restraint would snap.  He had been so close to doing just that when they had danced in his Ninth body.  He had been nearly unable to control himself when it had come to her.  

She was the part of him that put him back together after the war.  Holding his hand had turned into holding his hearts and if she squeezed just right, she could break him.  She had too much power, held in her delicate hands.  And she didn't even know she possessed it, which was painful enough for both of them together. 

He tossed and turned, willing images of her face, marred with rejection, to leave his mind.  She had been so upset, and it had been valid.  It wasn't fair to her, he knew that.  But he needed to keep her away from himself and that was not something that could be put into question. 

She had to understand, even if she didn't like it.  She likely was basing anything off emotions and hormones.  She had no deep ties to him, and a part of him really did fear that she would leave him to stay with Mr. Taylor, despite her protests of that very nature.  He was human and he was a man who could give her exactly what she needed.  A steady home, life, family.  Children.  The woman at the shop knowing her by name and her holding a blonde baby on her hip. 

 _No._ He was not allowed to think such things, mostly because they made his stomach turn and he wasn't allowed to have her affect him so strongly.  How had this happened? How had he let this happen, let her get so far under his skin that he could barely keep himself contained when she was in the room.  He always found himself wanting to hold her. 

***

Rose, on the other hand, knew none of what the Doctor was thinking about. She knew he had his 'Last of the Time Lords' issues and knew that he was a dreadfully confusing man-or alien- but never like this.  She had collapsed into her bed and cried.  If he was so unwilling and repulsed by her... She couldn't even bear to think about it.  She knew he didn't love her.  She knew he thought of her as 'just some human' and she _knew_ that he was just tactical and she should take nothing for it.

He just seemed to want everyone else but her. 

She pulled herself up from the pillows and changed into pajamas and brushed her hair before collapsing into bed once more.  Her door was locked and she felt as though her chest was as well. She curled in on herself, wrapped in blankets and pillows and warmth, and cried herself to sleep.

She had never felt more rejected and unattractive in her life. 

***

The next morning she woke to a knock at her door.  She blinked blearily and looked up at the door.  "Who is it?" she called out, her voice hoarse from crying.  She winced at the sound. 

"I brought breakfast," a timid voice came from outside her room. It was the Doctor.  She flopped back against her pillows and nearly groaned at the very sound of his voice.  She bit her lip and closed her eyes.  She could do this.  It was just the Doctor, really.  He was still her best mate, even if he hurt her over and over with no remorse.  She sat up and rolled out of bed, grabbing a dressing gown and tying it around herself. 

"I just woke up, but you can come in," she said tiredly, scratching her head and parting it deeply on one side.  

She realized the door was still locked and rushed over to open it for him.  He seemed startled by that, holding a tray with two plates and two cups of coffee.  Rose turned away from him and sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for him to come over and sit next to her.  He did, sat far away from her, though, and put the tray in between them. 

"Are you alright?" he asked, searching her face.  She cursed inwardly at the thought that they were probably red and irritated.  

"I just woke up," she replied, watching him just as studiously as he was watching her.  She saw him swallow, saw his Adam's apple bob with discomfort, and she reached for the food, eating slowly. 

"I don't have to be at the church until one," he said.

"I know," she replied.

"We could... Go on a walk."

"I might go back to bed," she said, raising her eyes to his.  "I'm tired.  And you might want to get to the church early, just in case."

He shifted awkwardly against the duvet on her bed.  "Yeah, I suppose Pastor Rick might need me.  Maybe."  he watched her. "You could come with me."

She shook her head.  "I'm tired," she repeated. 

There was an awkward silence between them, the only sound that of clinking utensils.  He was studying her as though she was another one of his unearthly creatures that he wanted to put under a microscope.  

She hated it. She hated how he was examining her, and it made her so angry.  She clenched her fists and tried not to throw the scalding coffee on him.  Instead, she decided not to say another word to him as she ate and didn't even look at him.  She yawned a couple times, trying to keep up with the pretense of being tired, and he seemed to buy it, although reluctantly.  Finally, when they'd both eaten, she stood up.  

"I'm going back to sleep.  I've got an alarm clock, I'll be fine."  She glanced down at her cuticles and slid her thumb over her other thumbnail.  He got to his feet as well and touched her shoulder.  She looked up at him and he stared at her, a question in his eyes.  She nodded and he pulled her into his arms, arms around her back.  She patted his back, closing her eyes and reveling in the double beat of his hearts under her ear.  She pulled away first and she barely registered the fact that he tried to hold onto her a little tighter before letting go.  He almost scrabbled at her back but he seemed to restrain himself.  His hands slid along her ribs as he released her.

She smoothed her hair down and tucked some of it behind her hair.  His fingers twitched at his side with an urge to do that for her.  "See you," she said softly, sounding like she was on the verge of tears.

Rose did not hold on to jealousy.  She felt it, but she let it go.  Rejection, however.  She seemed to hold it tight, to remember exactly how the pain had felt.  It burned him.  

He nodded tightly and she saw emotion stirring behind his eyes as he lifted the tray and headed for the door. At the last moment he turned towards her and opened and closed his mouth, struggling to find words, before saying "I'll pick you up at six," really quite firmly, and she nodded, because something like that was really not up for discussion, and never would be for the Doctor.   He would always come get her, regardless of what he thought she wanted.  One day, she would tell him not to come, and he would show up on her doorstep with an anxious look on his face.  She would never turn him away. 

It was easy to fall asleep when she had cried so much the night before.  She set an alarm for one o clock before dropping off into a deep sleep.  

***

Pastor Rick regarded the Doctor carefully when he entered the church and cocked his eyebrow.  "What's going on with you, Doctor?" he asked, crossing his leg, ankle over knee.  He leaned back in his desk chair, waiting patiently for the Doctor to answer him. 

The Doctor rubbed his forehead and sat in the chair across from him.  "Yeah," he said, drawn out, "It's a bit... Miss Tyler," he said carefully, not wanting to give too much away at all. 

Pastor Rick watched him carefully.  "What happened?" He asked. 

"Nothing," he said.  "We went to the diner, quaint little place.  And after we ate, she wanted to dance with me."

"So?"

The Doctor fidgeted in his seat and scratched the back of his neck.  "Well, I don't... I didn't... I shouldn't.... She's-"

"You feel something for her.  She's familiar, she's from your own homeplace."

He nearly wanted to scoff, that was so far from the truth.  "God wouldn't want me to," he said, crossing his arms.  There, that was a good answer, one the pastor couldn't argue with at all. 

Pastor Rick surprised him by laughing heartily, uncrossing his legs to lean over and laugh even harder.  "Oh, come now, Doctor.  God invented marriage. He created the consummation of marriage.  He created love.  How could you think that He wouldn't want you to find happiness in a woman?"

The Doctor was shocked by that answer and found that he didn't even have anything to say.  He squinted. "I want... I don't... Are you married, Pastor?"

"With three lovely children," he replied firmly.  'It's good to be happy," he insisted. "Perhaps Miss Tyler can make you happy."

He wished he could tell her how much he knew Rose made him happy.  But he could never have her, and that was the barrier he wished to overcome so that he could move on, having a life with Rose Tyler in it, but not one where Rose gripped his soul.  She held him captive and she could never leave him, and he could never leave her.  It really wasn't fair to either of them.  

The Pastor smiled softly.  He could see the conflict in the Doctor's eyes, the war, the pain that he held, even if he didn't know what that pain was.  "Have you ever considered, dear Doctor, that you deserve a love as strong as one that a woman can give a man?"

A sharp look softened, and the Doctor shook his head.  "No,' he said softly, "I don't deserve anything that Rose Tyler can give me. She has a heart too big for her own good."

"Then you can protect her."

"I can't," he said, "I can't protect her from anything.  She's too... She's just.. And I'm..." He shook his head.  "I don't want to talk about this, Pastor."

"Which is exactly why you should," the Pastor got to his feet and started pacing, talking with his hands in an exuberant fashion and.  "You are not held back by your emotion, just pushed up because of it.  You need those things.  They're good for you."

The Doctor shook his head, "Not for me. I don't need it, I don't need that emotion."

The Pastor sagged a little, seeming to get that the Doctor was not a man to get too easily.  He gave the Doctor a sad look. "A life without love is a sad life indeed," he said, "And not to be presumptuous, but I think you know that full well.  I hope to meet Miss Tyler this Sunday."

"You will," the Doctor replied.  He knew she'd come because he asked, even if she was upset with him.  It tugged at his hearts, that she was so willing to come with him no matter where he went.  He pushed the thought from his head and stared up at the Pastor, trying to erase it as though he'd never let it enter his head to begin with.  "Now, Pastor Rick, what do I need to do before the couple gets here for their counselling?"

The Pastor smiled weakly.  This man was going to be a work in progress.


	6. Chapter 6

The couple that Pastor Rick was counselling seemed to be the epitome of grace, a mousy woman with brown hair and a man who was far taller than her with black hair.  The Doctor shook their hands and smiled warmly as the pastor introduced him, trying to force thoughts of Rose from his head.  He knew these people, they were his hosts.

"Mr. And Mrs. Cray, thank you for allowing me into your home."  He said, just so they knew who he was. 

"Oh!" Allison Cray smiled warmly.  "Of course!  You are to be a pastor, after all, and what better company to keep?" 

Robert just scowled and turned to the Pastor.  "Do you think it's really necessary to have him here?" he snapped.

Pastor Rick frowned.  "Yes," he said firmly, "It's important that the Doctor learns all aspects of being a pastor, including helping the congregation."

Robert shot the Doctor a scathing look.  "I still don't thinks someone who is living under the same roof as us should have access to our personal records."

"I don't," the Doctor replied, "I can't look at your personal records, and why would I?  Besides, anything said in this room is said in confidence.  I'm not going to say anything."

Robert seemed to be unconvinced but didn't say anything, only sat down across from the pastor without waiting for his wife to sit.  The Doctor gestured for her to sit and she did, smiling a little sadly as she did so. 

The pastor had moved a seat next to his behind the desk so that the Doctor could sit there too.  He laced his fingers together over his knee, trying not to look too uncomfortable, even though he was actually feeling quite uncomfortable.  Robert had an air to himself that the Doctor didn't like, and he wondered what his whole 'deal' was, as Rose would say.

He berated himself for even thinking her name. he had to play his part, and his part was as a pastor who was committed to his church, and he couldn't do anything about it.  There were times when he needed to lay low, and now was one of those times.  

"Last week we talked about the lines of communication," Pastor Rick said, leaning back in a fashion that made him seem approachable and friendly, but still interested. "So, how has that gone?"

"Fine," Robert said, at the same time Allison said "Not well."

The pastor furrowed his brows. "Uh-oh," he said warningly.  He turned to Allison.  "Why don't you explain to me what you mean?"

Allison fidgeted with her hands, staring down at them.  "He still stares at the other girls, Pastor, and he doesn't care that I don't like it."

The Doctor slumped in his chair, feeling intense sympathy for the poor woman sitting before him.  This was going to be a very long afternoon.

***

Rose woke up at one, surprised that she had slept that long.  Her alarm clock blared at her and she shut it off quickly, sitting up and running a hand through her hair.  It occurred to her that perhaps she had been too harsh on the Doctor.  She'd given him the cold shoulder all morning, and of course he noticed. He was not a stupid man, after all.  He was quite fond of reminding people that he was the opposite. 

She rubbed her forehead and moved to the dresser to pick out something to wear.  She blew out her cheeks and picked up a pale pink, almost white skirt with her white button down shirt and pink cardigan.  After slipping on her socks and shoes, she put her makeup on in the en suite and pulled her hair up with a hair tie with a ribbon tied around it.  

She hadn't thought she was unattractive, before all this, but the Doctor's utter repulsion to her made her think that maybe she was.  She bit back irrational tears.  This was ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous.  There was no reason for her to be dwelling on something that was just Doctor behavior. he was an odd duck, she knew that.  Anything he did couldn't really be called out as rudeness if he didn't mean it as such.  She bit her lip.  No.  He was being rude.  He couldn't stop her from thinking that.

She didn't want to go to Mr. Taylor's office early.  That wasn't really something she was looking forward to at all.  She smoothed her hands over her skirt and tried to find a way to busy herself until three o' clock.  

It ended up being a lot of pacing and reading a book that she found in the room, but even then her mind kept wandering and wandering.  She was getting fidgety, and she found that while she had once been irritated at the Doctor for not wanting to do domestic, she really couldn't do it either.  Being in one place for too long made her anxious and irritable.  She was turning to be like him, and she found herself smiling at a thought that would send him cringing.

Soon enough, but too soon, it was time for her to go to Mr. Taylor's.  She wondered if the Doctor would actually pick her up at six, because that would mean that she was only working for three hours.  She hoped that wouldn't be a problem.  There were several things about Mr. Taylor that set her on edge, and she wasn't sure she wanted to make him angry. 

At three o' clock, the door to Mr. Taylor's office was closed, so she dropped her bag on her desk and rapped sharply on his door.  Mr. Taylor opened the door instead of just peeking around the edge, smiling down at her.

"Hi," he said, "I put the notes for the day on your desk."

"The Doctor is picking me up at six," she blurted out, though with far more confidence than she felt.  

Mr. Taylor's face seemed to darken momentarily before he put a tight smile back on his face. "Of course.  As long as my notes get done, that's just fine."

It didn't seem like it was 'just fine' though, he seemed full of an emotion that he was desperately trying to tamp down.  She nodded and turned to her desk.

"Maybe you should consider dinner with somebody else," he said casually, leaning against his door frame.  She could practically feel him staring at her.

Rose placed a paper into the typewriter and ignored him for a moment, tapping away at her keyboard and settling in for a long three hours.  

"Miss Tyler?  I spoke to you," he said, trying to draw her attention, the impatience in his voice quite obvious. 

She turned over her shoulder for a brief moment. "I heard you, Mr. Taylor," she replied, "But I don't really want to consider dinner with anyone else. I hope you don't mind.  The Doctor and I are friends, and I rather think that since I spend all day with you, it's only fair that he gets me for a couple hours."

"I'm only getting you for a couple hours," he protested, coming round in front of her.  "Miss Tyler, I think you and I have an unfulfilled connection."

Rose cocked an eyebrow at him.  "Oh, and you can tell that from a day of knowing me?"

"I have the gift of discernment," he replied easily.  "I think you and I would be great friends.  You shouldn't just limit yourself to one person in the town."

He was right.  In an odd way, he was right.  She rubbed at her wrist nervously and glanced up at him.  "You may be able to persuade me into lunch some day," she said cautiously, "As friends, with me as your assistant, or temp, or whatever, and nothing more."

Mr. Taylor grinned, a smile that made her stomach turn and not in the way she was used to the Doctor's smile turning her stomach.  He nodded. "I'll keep that in mind, Miss Tyler.  Sorry for getting in the way of your work."

His hand brushed her shoulder as he returned to his office and she leaned her chin in her hand. She hated to say that it was nice to be wanted, but it was nice to be wanted.  She didn't think that he would do anything to her.  Was he forward?  Of course, but she knew the values of the nineteen fifties and knew that in a town as small as this, if he did anything, he would be fired and booted from the town in a matter of hours.  

So she was safe.  The Doctor, on the other hand, didn't seem to think that she was.  But one lunch couldn't hurt.  Considering he'd forgotten, or simply hadn't, fed her the day before, she felt as though he sort of owed her.  He was an attractive man, after all.  It couldn't hurt.  And if the Doctor was insistent on pushing her away-

She shook her head, surprised by her own thoughts.  No, this wasn't going to be about getting back at the Doctor for rejecting her, because in all honesty, that wasn't fair to either of them.  Even if she did it for herself, she couldn't be certain as to what was going to happen when she told him about it.

Unless she didn't tell him about it at all. She chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully.  He really didn't need a spreadsheet of what she was doing and who she was doing it with. If he found out, that was fine, and she wasn't going to keep it from him, but she wasn't going to announce it to him either.  

Finally ridding herself of all her intrusive thoughts, she began typing the notes and cases that had been set out for her for the three hours that she was to be there. 

*****

The Doctor found that, long story short, the Crays had a terrible communication problem, and Robert had a habit of looking at other women.  Allison had admitted that she wanted to do away with their bed and breakfast (which would involve firing the maid and the cook) because he had a tendency to try and pull the guests. She had looked at the Doctor and fidgeted and the Doctor had promised that his confidentiality agreement still stood.

Robert had rolled his eyes and said that he could look at who he liked, when he liked, and Pastor Rick corrected him and restated the vows of faithfulness proclaimed on a wedding day.  Robert had fallen silent and Pastor Rick's eyes had blazed in fury at the very notion that someone could be so unfaithful to a woman right in front of the woman herself.

While Pastor Rick saw the Crays out of the church, he remained in his seat, his mind buzzing wildly with thoughts that were all clamoring to be front and center in his mind, begging for his attention.  When the pastor came back in, he sat on the opposite end of the desk and watched the Doctor carefully. 

"Are you alright?" he asked, tilting his head to the side and his brows furrowing together. 

The Doctor scrubbed his hand over his face. "Rose is staying in their bed and breakfast."

Pastor Rick seemed to understand, nodding slightly.  "You're worried that Robert will try to seduce her."

"Yes."

"Do you think she will relent?"

The Doctor shook his head, nearly violently, "No.  I absolutely do not think that she would. Not willingly at least."

"I don't think Robert is that sort of man," Pastor Rick said, "He has many flaws.  Many, many, _many_ flaws. But he knows you're close to Miss Tyler, and that you plan to remain so.  I doubt there will be a problem."

The Doctor nodded, thinking that over.  At least there could be one thing that he could protect Rose from, because he _would_ protect her.  He needed her safe.  

"I don't know if I can save their marriage," Pastor Rick said, "I believe Allison deserves better in a man, and Robert could never respect any woman, let alone his wife."  He pursed his lips.  "I think my wife has spoken to her a few times.  Maybe she can help."

"I hope so," The Doctor said honestly.  He was staring to wonder if he needed some help himself. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story has received a touch of hate on the last chapter and I feel the need to address it here. I did not want to address it in the comments because I didn't want to start a discussion where people are writing other, more positive things, and I don't want the writer of the original comment to be on the receiving end of any hate by people who are passionate about what they are reading. As some of you know I have received criticism before and have taken it with grace and messaged the commenters back. However, I felt that the comment left on the last chapter was not constructive as it was several paragraphs on things I did inaccurately when it comes to the history of The 1950s and not a single positive word. I recognize that I did do a few things wrong, I understand the history of the 1950s quite well, actually, and will most likely go back to edit these chapters at a later date, and am improving on the history of it in this chapter. I thank the commentor for the information they gave me, but I do not thank them for the way they approached me. The reason I'm saying all this is that I feel there is something that you must understand. This website is not my livelihood. I am a full-time student as well as an aspiring actor and cannot spend multiple hours researching history before I begin the story. The novels I write that are not fanfiction are a bit more in depth and a bit more consistent. My focus is to get content out to those who want to read it. I said at the beginning of the story that was going to be a more domestic one mostly between 10 and Rose. There are other stories I have done which focus more on the history of the time. This is not one of them. What I wanted was a setting where 10 would be forced to hold Rose at arms length at all times. I feel in that respect I've captured it well. My point is simply this; if you do not like a single thing about any of the stories I've written, do not read them. I don't believe there was a single thing in there which the commenter approved of or liked about my story, which is fine, but if you dislike the material, what is the point in leaving a comment? There are fanfics that I have not enjoyed but I've clicked away from them without saying a word because is not my business how other people run their accounts. That being said I love you all and hope to remedy this mistake although I wish it had been presented to me in a gentler way since I took it in perhaps a more belittling way than intended, making it hard to want to even finish the story. I am a writer and I'm not perfect and I am young. I'm doing my best to give people with they're asking of me and I feel that so far I've done quite well. If I have sold any of you short on the story I apologize and I hope to fix it for all of you, this chapter will hopefully be better for you. That being said, I cannot rewrite the whole story, there are things that have to remain the way they are. I'm sorry you dislike my story, reader, and I hope that perhaps I produce other content that you would enjoy more and fix this work. To those of you staying on the adventure with me, enjoy this chapter and much love to you all:)
> 
> PS- I had Mr. Taylor's true colors written for a few days, even if they were tweaked a little

The days passed slowly, and Rose found that it was difficult for her to make friends in the town.  People seemed wary of her, and she didn't know why.  Honestly, it hurt her a bit, considering how people on other planets had treated her better than people of Earth were at this moment.

She was still not talking to the Doctor, not really, even though he picked her up from Mr. Taylor's office every night at six.  They didn't eat together anymore, and she certainly wasn't about to go back to the restaurant they'd been to on their second night.  

The matter of Mr. Taylor did not escape her.  He didn't seem interested in her at all, and yet he wanted to take her out to lunch.  He'd seemed to be interested in her the first couple of times they'd spoken, but now he just handed her his notes, sent her on errands, and did nothing else.  They spoke only when necessary, and though Rose wasn't upset about it, it was a bit confusing.

The Doctor and Pastor Rick worked valiantly to save Robert and Allison's marriage.  

"It's a scandal, my boy," the pastor said softly after that first session.  "The town doesn't even know they come to me for counselling."

Their first Sunday, Rose and the Doctor were sat together in a front pew, but when the Pastor introduced them, no one clapped except for Allison.  Rose chewed her bottom lip and wished she could escape. The Doctor set his mouth in a grim line.  He should've warned her about all this, he knew it was coming. 

After the service, the Doctor tilted his head to indicate that she should introduce herself to the pastor.  She furrowed her brows at him and nodded, walking up to the pastor. 

"Hello," she said, "I'm Rose Tyler."

Pastor Rick smiled warmly.  "Oh, yes, I've heard a lot about you.  You know, it's rather lucky that you were allowed over here."

Rose frowned but decided not to say anything. Instead, she just nodded.  "God is good, Pastor Rick," she said softly, glancing at the Doctor.

"He is indeed," the pastor said happily.  "Well, know that I'm on your side, the both of you," he said warmly, and the Doctor smiled.

"Thank you," he said, "I'll be back tomorrow."

The Pastor lifted his hand in dismissal with a smile on his face and the Doctor headed for the back door of the church.  Rose followed, suddenly feeling like a stranger in her own skin.

"So, what was that all about?" She asked timidly, feeling stupid.

The Doctor turned to her once they were on a sidewalk, past the crowd still coming out of the church. "I should've told you, Rose, I'm sorry."

"Told me what?"

"The Red Scare," he said forcefully.  "America was trying to prevent the spread of Communism, and there were lots of... Internal cases of fear.  It made people very wary of anyone across the ocean from them, mostly Russians but anyone was fair game," he was speaking slowly, as though he was teaching a child. 

"And you didn't think to tell me that everyone here would hate me?" She demanded. 

The Doctor winced. "I was hoping that people here would be a bit less caring about it, because it's such a small town."

"Yes, because small towns are so disconnected from the rest of the world," Rose crossed her arms and stopped walking so he was forced to turn around and look at her head on. 

He'd seen Rose angry more times than he would've liked this trip.  Most of the time it was his fault, which made him upset as well. SO then they were both angry and there was nothing either of them could do about it.  The Doctor shoved his hands in his pockets and scowled at her. 

"I don't know everything, Rose," he scolded.

"Oh, don't you?" She asked with mock surprise, "Could've fooled me, Doctor!" She squeezed her arms tighter around herself. "I feel so stupid."

"Don't, Rose, you probably didn't even learn that sort of American history in school.  Why would you?  Interesting things were happening in your country at the time," he tried to defend himself, tried to win her back. He needed to be in her favor, he wasn't sure what he would do if she wasn't.   

"I hate that you're doing this to me," she blurted out.

He blinked.  "What?"

"There was no market we could get this TARDIS part at?" She asked.

"No," he said, "We couldn't."

She bit her lip and looked away.  "Oh."

His hearts lurched.  "I don't want to hurt you, Rose, I never wanted to hurt you."

"There was no other place you could pick?  A place where I could talk to people?"

"The TARDIS put us where she thought it would be best," the Doctor replied.

The worry lines in Rose's face evened out. "I can't be mad at the TARDIS," She said softly. 

He almost smiled at that.  He knew she loved the TARDIS and knew that she would never do anything to make his ship upset.  "I should've told you, Rose." he said, "But Pastor Rick was so kind, I just figured-"

"Why is he so kind?" Rose asked, cutting him off before he descended into another ramble that could last God knew how long.

The Doctor lifted his shoulder, "Maybe he thinks that God can protect him from the communists," he smiled tightly and Rose snorted. 

"Well, we're not Communists," she said.

"They don't know that," the Doctor reminded her gently, "But we can try to make them see."

"No," Rose shook her head, her bangs flying into her face.  She brushed them away and looked up at him again.  "No.  I need to lay low, keep quiet, fill out my notes for Mr. Taylor and pick up his stupid laundry."

The Doctor smiled softly. "If that's what you want."

"It's not," she replied, "I like making friends, Doctor, I love meeting new people, you know that.  But I can't now, because everyone thinks.... God, that's awful," She furrowed her brows.  "I feel awful," she fidgeted, her shoulder lifting and falling in discomfort.

He wanted to reach out and hug her, but he knew that she probably wouldn't allow it, as they hadn't really touched since their fight. She's been cautious with him, and he didn't want to shatter the gentle kindness that had come back into her posture and attitude.  

"You shouldn't feel awful, Rose, we'll be out of here as soon as possible," he promised, "I don't want to be here any more than you do, really."

He watched her closely, his eyes searching hers as though he was reading a book that had subtext and footnotes.  And really, that was how complicated Rose was, especially to him.  He smiled tightly at her, and she offered it back, but found that she wanted to up and hide forever now that she knew what people in town thought of them.

She resented the Doctor for not telling her about the history behind this time period.  She resented herself for not knowing. She wished that there was a way to change so many parts of this trip. She couldn't be in the same room as the Doctor, she couldn't see him often, and when she did see him she felt awkward because of the second night there.  She'd ruined everything. 

She scrubbed her hand over her cheek as they walked back to the bed and breakfast.  Rose planned to sleep for the rest of the day, now. She wanted a way to escape more than anything.  Maybe she could find one that would've make the Doctor angry.  

The Doctor kept chancing glances back at her, as though he was thinking of a million things to say and not voicing a single one of them.  She watched him expectantly every time he turned around but he just shook his head and opened and closed his mouth like a gaping fish. 

She rolled her eyes up to the sky.  She realized, now, how people were looking at her.  Now that she was aware, she saw people from church giving her odd looks.  They were trying to be discreet about their hatred, and Rose wished that there would be more discretion than there was.

The days passed slower and slower for Rose.  She went into Mr. Taylor's office, the Doctor picked her up, go to bed, repeat.  Over and over the same thing.  She rarely spoke, and almost wanted to put on a fake American accent, but everyone knew her already.  She wanted to run, and then finally, Mr. Taylor asked her to lunch.  She said yes. 

He didn't take her to the diner, which was confusing all by itself.  She walked behind him, watching his every move.  He passed the town entirely, walking out towards the field that the Doctor had suggested the part would turn up in. Her stomach dropped.  Did he know about it?

"Uh, Mr. Taylor, I know that the town is very small, but there is probably a restaurant that's suitable for-"

He turned on her, a knife in his hand.  She stepped back, her eyes wide with shock.  She felt her heart hammering in her chest, almost unable to think, much less say anything at all.  Her breathing was heavier and she held her hands out in a gesture of innocence.

"You're one of them," he said, "Sneaking over here, trying to destroy us."

"No," she said, "I'm not.  I'm just English, there's nothing wrong with being English."

"You and that Doctor of yours," he said, "All I had to do was get you alone.  You're weak, a woman."

She wanted to argue, her 21st Century values rising in her throat, but instead she shrank back. It might be the one thing that could save her life, and that was all she wanted.  "Well, and what do you expect me to do?"

"I'm a lawyer," he said, "I can read people very easily.  You're guilty of something."

Well, right in one, but it wasn't about anything that had to do with the Red Scare.  She swallowed hard and looked around her.  She glanced across the field to the barn by the bus stop.  The _barn._ That's where the TARDIS was, she reminded herself, and all she had to do was get over to there.  Adrenaline pumped through her, and she wondered what would happen.  What did he plan to do, exactly?  Kill her?  Kill the Doctor?  She swallowed hard and glanced up at his eyes.

"You don't want to hurt me," she said softly.  "They'll find me."

"Out in this field?  Unlikely," he said, brandishing the knife. "And it's not like the Doctor will come for you," he added. 

"How have you not shown your true colors to the people in this town?" Rose asked, trying to keep her demeanor meek and fearing that she was failing spectacularly.  She wrung her hands, trying to find something to do with them.  

He seemed to falter at her gesture of fear, and she saw that as her opening. She darted from him, lifting her skirts and running in the direction of the TARDIS.  Mr. Taylor shouted after her but she didn't stop, forcing her legs to pump faster, bend, flex, push, running for her life.  She knew what it was like, knew how to be faster than her pursuer.  

She saw the TARDIS behind the barn and nearly sobbed in relief.  It was with a sinking feeling that she remembered what the Doctor had said.  He'd said that if they showed a person where the TARDIS was, they'd know it existed.  

She had a lead on him, maybe she could disappear before he saw her.  She disappeared around the corner of the barn and was relieved to see he wasn't behind her, not yet. She wrestled with her TARDIS key and shoved it in the lock before she let herself into the TARDIS, slamming the door behind her.  The TARDIS hummed happily at having her back, and Rose stroked the wall in greeting. 

There was no sound of Mr. Taylor coming after her, no pounding on the doors, and Rose collapsed to the grated floor of the TARDIS, her hand on her head. She wasn't sure how she made it, but now she wasn't going to let herself out of the TARDIS. 

She felt tears rise in her throat and this time she didn't hold them back.  She cried openly, her head in her hands, and looked up at the ceiling.  "Can you tell the Doctor where I am?" She asked the ship. "I can't go back out.  I can't."

The ship hummed reassuringly to Rose, who managed to rise to her feet.  "I wish he'd told me, I don't know why I'm like this!" She said, feeling disoriented and not like herself. She wanted to be back to herself, because she knew that she was a happy person, but she'd been nothing but miserable since they'd gotten here.  

The TARDIS kept sending her reassuring hums and tried to project something to the Doctor.  This would certainly not end well.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Love, love, endless love to those supporting me in the comments <3 You are truly beautiful people and I treasure your existence in my life.

Rose stayed in the TARDIS, hoping that the ship had told the Doctor what had happened to her.  She couldn't go back out, not if Mr. Taylor was planning to kill her.  She supposed she could just... Not go into work.  But he was the last person she had been seen with.  If she was missing for a couple days, she could get away with it, and come home and say that she had been afraid for her life.  

But who would believe her?  She was new in town after all, and Mr. Taylor seemed to be paranoid, but reliable.  She chewed on her thumbnail as she paced her way along her bedroom.  Quite frankly, she was terrified. She hadn't been this scared of a man since she had been with Jimmy Stone, and she had gotten away.  

The TARDIS seemed to agree that Rose should stay in the TARDIS, as when she came back out to the console room, there was a wooden bar across the doors.  She looked up at the ceiling and crossed her arms.  

"So what about the Doctor then?" She asked, chewing her bottom lip.  "Does he know?"

She wished she knew how to communicate with the TARDIS in a way that the Doctor did.  She sat on the jump seat and looked around the room.  She was certain to get bored, mostly because she couldn't stay away from the Doctor for more than a day, it was very painful.  So now she had to be without him until the TARDIS let her out.  Though, to be honest, she didn't want to escape too badly, as she felt safe. 

The ship hummed happily at Rose, as though singing because she was safe.  Rose reached over and patted the coral wall.  "Thank you for letting me in and being worried about me," she said, her gratefulness in her voice.  "I just don't want the Doctor to be unsafe, you know? How long do I have to stay?"

The TARIDS seemed to show her a number '2' and Rose nodded.  Two days.  Because it certainly wasn't two hours, or two minutes, or two weeks.  She resolved herself to the fact that she was just going to have to play house in the TARDIS alone for a few days.  

She could do that... It was just a matter of the Doctor finding out she was safe.  That was the important thing, and she knew that perhaps better than anyone.  He would protect her and let her secrecy be secrecy, simply because she wanted it to be so.  She wondered what he would do to Mr. Taylor if he found out about his paranoia.

****

The TARDIS had done her best to send the signals necessary to the Doctor, but unfortunately, it hadn't gone through, as he was preoccupied with so many other things. He spent many long hours at his desk, going over things for the pastor and writing 'practice sermons' that Pastor Rick often wanted to look over.   The Doctor reckoned that this was the most studying he had done sine the Academy, and that was the most busywork he had ever done as well. At least with this, he could remember that Rose was waiting for him at the end of the day. 

Of course, these thoughts of Rose and his work were the very reason the TARDIS was pushing so hard to get the Doctor's attention.  It didn't seem to work, though, as he felt a light stirring in the back of his head and nothing more.  He batted it away, ignoring it, dismissing it, since it didn't feel like the TARDIS.  

"Are you doing alright in here?" Pastor Rick asked at about four o' clock, as he passed the other man's office. 

The Doctor pulled his glasses from his face. "Oh, yes," he said, "But I will have to go pick up Rose in about an hour and a half," he glanced at the clock.  "Uh.  As usual."

Pastor Rick smiled.  "Yes, as usual.  How is Miss Tyler?  I haven't seen her since church."

"She's well," the Doctor said cautiously, "A bit... She's having trouble getting adjusted," he admitted.

Pastor Rick nodded. "Of course.  I understand that.  I think she'll be fine, you know.  Especially since she has you to talk to."

The Doctor pursed his lips, a dimple appearing in his cheek.  "I'm afraid I haven't been the best friend to Rose as of late, sir."

"Oh?"  The pastor seemed genuinely intrigued by this.  He leaned his shoulder against the door frame and raised his eyebrows, prepping to listen to whatever the Doctor had to say. 

The Doctor rubbed his forehead with his thumb and pointer finger, and closed his eyes. "She expressed... Interest."

"That's great!" the Pastor said, "You seem to like her a lot.  You know, the kids are saying that even adults are 'going steady' now.  Is that why you've not been a friend, you've been something more?"

He looked up at the Pastor painfully.  "No.  I... I turned her down."

Pastor Rick rolled his eyes.  "Really?"

The Doctor furrowed his brows.  "Why yes, of course, I can't... I can't _date_ Miss Tyler, that would be-"

"Perfect?  Exactly what you want?" the pastor asked, "I've seen how you look at her in church.  She feels something so strong for you, Doctor, we can all see it."

"I know she does, but she can't... I don't... Listen.  I'm not in any position to be dating anyone.  OR going steady, or whatever you call it."

"She loves you."

The words hit him like a blow to the chest.  He felt his breath whoosh out of him and he closed his eyes for a moment before looking back up at Pastor Rick.  "She does, doesn't she?" he said softly.  "Wait a minute, how do you know that?  How could you even begin to know that?"

The Pastor smiled. "God is love, my son.  And, let me ask: Do you love her?"

"Miss Tyler and I share a... Heritage.  We are friends, but I don't believe that we should be anything else.  We can't be together.  Don't you think I should be focusing more on my preaching than on a woman?"

"Normally, I would say yes," Pastor Rick said bluntly.  "I should say yes. Honestly, if people in the town knew I was talking to you in this way, they wouldn't appreciate it.  But I think it might do you less good to be without her. I think you should take her out again, perhaps tonight, perhaps another night."

"That's just... I can't."  The Doctor said, only thinking about all the different rules and reasons that he could not have Rose in the romantic sense.  "She's a woman of the world, Pastor Rick.  She doesn't want a... A boyfriend."

"I think if you asked her, she would say otherwise," Pastor Rick said calmly.  "At least talk to her, will you?" 

The Doctor knew that he wasn't going to get anywhere unless he agreed, so he nodded before looking up at the other man curiously.  "How did you meet your wife, pastor?" he asked, suddenly genuinely curious about it.  

The pastor smiled.  "We had both gone to see the same play in the city, with friends.  I ran into her and spoke with her and found that it was more interesting to talk to her than to talk without her, or with somebody else.  People treat women like cattle around here.  You're one of the few that does not."

"As are you," the Doctor said, surprised.  "You seem to love your wife, and not just for the... Benefits of having a wife."

The pastor let out a loud bark of laughter and nodded.  "I assume that you'd be the same, Doctor," he admitted.  "Talk to her, at least?"

The Doctor sighed, already broken down by the idea of Rose looking at him with eyes round and smile bright. He could practically feel her hand in his and wished it was real. He missed her touch so much.  It was painful, going this long without a hug or a friendly hand hold.  Or... Not so friendly.  Lately, before they had come here, the hand holding had been less than friendly, her thumb stroking over his. And he let her. He let her because he wanted her to get as close as possible without being... Too close.

"I'll talk to her," he relented. If he didn't talk to her, be it about why their relationship had to change or why it mus remain the same, he needed to rebuild their friendship. He needed her, needed her still, and couldn't go the rest of this trip and the rest of his life without having her in it.  She was vital in a way he had never wanted someone to be for him.

"I hope you see me as a friend, as much as a mentor," Pastor Rick interrupted his thoughts.  

The Doctor had to nod.  "Of course.  Thank you."

The pastor smiled and disappeared from the Doctor's doorway. He ran his hands over his face and tried to go back to his work.  He ignored the pestering in the back of his mind and continued working until it was time to go and pick up Rose. 

When he entered Mr. Taylor's office, Rose was not at her desk.  His hearts thundered in his chest.  Was she in Mr. Taylor's office?  With Mr. Taylor?  He swallowed hard and approached the door, knocking sharply on it.  Mr. Taylor opened it, looking incredibly professional, not a thread on his suit out of place. The Doctor narrowed his eyes at the other man. 

"I'm here to get Miss Tyler," he said, trying to glance past Mr. Taylor.  He wasn't trying terribly hard to block it, and the Doctor could tell that no one was in the room behind him.  He set his jaw and stared at Mr. Taylor, daring him to challenge him. 

"She's not here," he said bluntly.

"I can see that.  Where is she?"

Mr. Taylor shrugged, a bit too nonchalantly for the Doctor's liking.  "I can't say.  She went on a break and then didn't return."

The Doctor stood a little taller, trying to make himself seem more threatening.  "Where was she headed?  Did she tell you?"

"No," Mr. Taylor said blandly, as though he wasn't even a bit concerned that a woman who was technically under his charge had disappeared.  

"And did you report her missing?  Surely you have a police station."

"And surely they have better things to do than look for a young English woman that probably just got lost."  Mr. Taylor crossed his arms. "She'll probably turn up. I wouldn't worry about her too much, if I were you."

"I'm already worried," The Doctor said, trying not to grind his teeth.  "Miss Tyler is a good friend of mine, and I'd hoped that since she is your assistant, you'd be a bit concerned for her well being as well."

Mr. Taylor furrowed his brows.  "I have actually done quite well on my own before Miss Tyler was thrown into the picture. She's not as useful as you would want to think.  She's a bit useless, really.  She makes mistakes and wastes paper and she's a hormonal _woman._ Maybe it's best that she disappeared."

The Doctor's temper flared at that. "Don't you _dare,"_ he snarled.  "Miss Tyler is the most important woman you could ever possibly meet, and you should tell me where she is."

"I don't know!" Mr. Taylor shouted. "I don't know, because she just vanished!  This is ridiculous, Doctor.  If you're even a real Doctor.  Why do people call you that, anyway?"

"That's not the point!" The Doctor yelled back, balling his hands into fists.  "You're being very blase about Rose being missing and I don't much appreciate that. Now I'm going to find her, and you can keep your sorry arse here unless you want to help me.  Do you want to help me?"

Mr. Taylor did not seem afraid of the Doctor.  The corner of his mouth tipped up.  "It won't be hard to find another secretary."

The Doctor clenched his jaw and turned from the man, leaving the building.  He had to find Rose.  Little did Mr. Taylor know what he had just awoken.

The Oncoming Storm.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I anticipate this story to be another one or two chapters, at the most maybe a nice even 12-? Not sure yet. I'm going to see where it takes me:)   
> Enjoy!

The TARDIS was angry, but she wasn't angry at Rose.  Well, in a way she was.  She was angry that Rose kept trying to escape the safety that laid within her walls.  Every hour, Rose checked the door, but the TARDIS kept putting more and more blocks on it, blocks that Rose couldn't possibly hope to get through.

After the fourth hour of trying, Rose looked at the steel and woods boards and bars blocking up the door.  She crossed her arms and glared at the ceiling.  "I know you said I should stay for two days, but I'm already going spare.  And what's the Doctor going to think?  You _did_ get through to him, didn't you?"

The TARDIS didn't reply, not even with a cheerful little hum that would tell Rose that she was right.  Rose narrowed her eyes and approached the door with a sort of determination that she hadn't been aware she had. 

She didn't want the Doctor to fear for her.  Was kidnapping an issue in this time, and in this area?  She had no idea.  She had no idea about a lot of things, she thought bitterly, as the Doctor hadn't seen fit to tell her anything important.  

Of course, she was angry at him, for his attitude towards her and his blase thoughts towards all these different ideas.  He didn't listen to her, and never would.  He didn't love her, and never would. 

Some bitter, wildly female part of her, thought that perhaps it would be for the best, then, that he thought she was missing.  She regretted the thought almost as soon as she thought it, but the TARDIS hummed in affirmation in her mind.  

Rose laughed.  "Oh, come on," she said, grinning.  "You don't really want him to worry about me.  And neither do I.  I want him to know I'm safe.  But I can't help thinking what might happen if he... Didn't see me.  Didn't know I was alright."

Before the TARDIS could hum another syllable, Rose leaned her forehead against the door and groaned. "Let me out," she begged, "Please.  He can keep me safe."

 _"No, he can't"_ was the very clear thought that came from the TARDIS. 

She was right, of course.  he couldn't keep her safe.  Well, maybe not in this world.  He couldn't protect her from Mr. Taylor after all.  She shivered at the thought.  The man was crazed.  She didn't want to go back to the bed and breakfast and find that Mr. Taylor was going to beat the ever loving-

The TARDIS screeched angrily in Rose's ear for even thinking such things and Rose winced, stepping back from the door.  She rubbed her ear and glared up at the ceiling. 

"I love you, but if you're going to be like this for the two days you're locking me in here, we're going to have words."

The ship just laughed in response and sent Rose a mental image that perhaps she should go to bed.  Rose supposed that was correct.  The time passed faster while sleeping, after all, and she needed to get out of here. 

"Why two days?" She asked the ship as she walked back to her room.  "What's so specific about those two days?"

Rose saw an image of something lying in a field, something organic looking, but not quite human and not quite a plant.  She let out a breath in understanding.  "Oh.  The part.  It'll crop up in two days, and then the Doctor will know to check here?  Could you let me out early? So I could go meet him?"

The TARDIS seemed to think about this for a moment, letting out a low undertone hum that seemed indecisive at best.  After a couple minutes, when Rose had finally reached her room, the TARDIS agreed. 

It was a new occurrence, that Rose could speak to the TARDIS.  She supposed it was because of how long she had traveled with the Doctor, after all.  He'd told her before that she had a stronger telepathic field than most humans, though she couldn't talk in so many words to the TARDIS that the Doctor could speak to her with. She suspected that that was also because of the fact that the Doctor was Time Lord, and the TARDIS probably was easier to understand if one knew Gallifreyan.  

She'd wanted him to teach her that, but he never had.  He'd wanted to, but he didn't know how to teach her.  It was complex and dizzying and bloody _circular_ and what species wrote like that?  The Doctor's, apparently, so she did her best to never insult him.  Or his circular language. 

Ever since she'd expressed an interest, he wrote her name on notes in Gallifreyan, so she could at least learn that.  He'd leave it on notes such as "we'll stop at Earth to get milk soon" and "If you want to pick the movie tonight, come to the library at 7:00".  It was all a bit romantic.  That was, if the Doctor did romantic, which of course, Rose was reminded that he didn't. 

She didn't want to think about that, though, so she changed into her pajamas.  It was odd to be in her own, and not the ones that the TARDIS had provided her at the beginning of the adventure.  It hadn't been long since they arrived, but Rose felt as though they'd been there forever.  

She hated it, sometimes.  Places that weren't beneficial to saving the world.  Why couldn't they have just waited in the TARDIS for the part to crop up?  Deep down, she knew why.  The Doctor didn't like to sit still, and Rose was long past admitting that she hated being in one place for very long; that was obvious.  But this was somehow different.  They couldn't even experience it together.  They lived too different lives in this world, which was painful.  

They'd spent all their time together for so long, that it was nearly unfathomable to her to be apart from him.  And that made her worried.  Was she depending on the Doctor? That was something she swore she'd never do again; depend on a man.

She took off her makeup and fell into bed, not bothering to shower.  She was so wound up that she figured she would've been distracted in there anyway.  She burrowed down in her covers and groaned into her pillow. 

"I hate it," she whispered to the air.  The TARDIS hummed softly in return and the faint strains of Glenn Miller pushed into her room.  Rose smiled.  The poor girl didn't know how to do anything else to help, but this... This memory, this reassurance, was very well thought out. 

"Thanks, old girl," Rose whispered, and the TARDIS sent her a happy wave of affection before slipping off to sleep.

*****

The Doctor had gone right back to the church and explained at a fevered pace what had happened, that he couldn't find Rose.  He'd apparently spoken too fast, because the Pastor had held up his hand and gotten to his feet, standing behind his desk. 

"Doctor, I'm afraid you sound a little hysterical.  What's going on?"

"Rose!" He shouted, nearly barreling the man over with his voice alone. "She's gone!  I went to pick her up and she was gone.  Mr. Taylor says he doesn't know what happened, but he is a shifty son of a-"

"Doctor!" Pastor Rick scolded.  "Come now, there's no use for that sort of language. The Lord does not appreciate it, neither does Rose, I'm sure.  She is very diligent in her attendance at the church." He paused and sighed a little, seeming frustrated with the Doctor's behavior.  "I will help you look for her. Have you checked the bed and breakfast that the both you stay in?" 

The Doctor shook his head, a little bashfully.  "No.  I just... I panicked."

"I know you did.  You care for her greatly, but we can't let your emotions attack you on this one.  Come now, let's go there."

The Doctor nodded, feeling a little put in his place by the calmness of the pastor.  Were all men of God like that, he wondered?  oh, he'd met his fair share of monks and priests, but he couldn't remember the last time he'd spoken to one for so long, or spent so much time with one. 

He trailed the pastor out of the church and then came up to walk next to him.  There was no sunlight left, which made the Doctor feel more panicked.  It would be harder to find Rose in the dark, unless she had just decided to go back to he room, because she didn't want him to pick her up. 

He kicked himself mentally. There would be plenty of reason for her to not want him to pick her up.  He hadn't treated her well, not through this.  And it wasn't just this adventure. He knew there had been moments in their adventures that he had not treated her fairly, had acted as though he'd forgotten her.  Of course he hadn't though.  He could never forget her. He cared for her, as the pastor had said. He would never admit how deeply, not to himself and certainly not to her.  

But this was different.  This was about her being missing, possibly because of something stupid that he had done.  He was a brilliant man, but he had done a lot of stupid things.  Did that make him... Not brilliant, anymore?  Unbrilliant?  

He shook himself as they approached the bed and breakfast.  The Doctor pushed past Pastor Rick and stormed into the house. Robert sat in an armchair in a living room, reading the paper with a cigarette in his mouth.  He put it out when they entered, leaving it smoking in the ashtray.  "Can I help you men?" He asked, his tone a bit more agreeable than it had been the last time they had spoken to him.  

"Yes.  Has Rose Tyler come in?"

Robert shook his head, looking, as well as sounding, agreeable.  He shook his head.  "I just got in myself.  My wife and I were going to do one of the communication exercises you suggested, Doctor." He rolled his eyes.  "All these new fangled ideas.  She... Well, she wants to boot Miss Tyler from the house."

The Doctor felt his eyebrows shoot up into his hairlsne.  "What do you mean, 'bot her from the house'?"

"I looked at her wrong, I guess," Robert said, "She says our marriage is more important than some pretty twenty something that came in here."  He shifted uncomfortably.  "She's right.  Of course, she is. I just... You can go up to your room if you want, but she didn't' do anything.  Allison, that is.  Nobody kicked anybody out."

"I'm relieved that the two of you are resolving your issues," the Pastor said, "But do you really think it's that easy?"

"No," Robert said softly, "I've been looking at women, but I look at my wife more."

"Excellent!" The Doctor nearly shouted, "Now let's go!"

Robert nodded and sat back down, looking at his newspaper.  It was an odd thing, he mused, how people could change so much.  He wondered if his change belonged to the Doctor.

The Doctor thundered up the stairs, his perfect memory leading him right to Rose's door.  He knocked on it, probably more harshly than he needed to.  

"Rose?  Rose, are you in here?" He asked loudly.  There was no answer.  He pressed his ear next to the door.  

"She could be ignoring me," he admitted, pulling away from the door. 

The pastor narrowed his eyes. "And why would that be?" 

"I, uh... I'm a lot of trouble."  He grinned weakly at Pastor Rick, who rolled his eyes. 

"Maybe you should try not being such a problem for her, Doctor."  He said.  He approached the door and knocked, gentler than the Doctor, not ruled by his emotions. "Now, Miss Tyler, if you're in there, could you come out for me, please? It's Pastor Rick."

The Doctor, however, grew tired of waiting.  He strode forward and opened the door, throwing the Pastor off balance.  He ignored the pastor's cry about the invasion of Rose's privacy and they stood, looking into the room. 

There were no lights on, and her clothes were still strewn around the room, just like she would've left them back on the TARDIS.  This was scary all by itself. If she had been in, the Doctor would've seen her standing in front of her bed, hands on hips and eyebrows drawn, asking why he'd gone into her personal space. 

But there was nothing.  The Doctor shook his head.  She wouldn't go to such great lengths to avoid him.  She was missing.  He ran into the en suite, calling for her, but she wasn't there either, and he turned to the pastor's stunned and absolutely scandalized face. 

The Doctor blew out a hard breath and carded his hands through his hair, "She's gone."


	10. Chapter 10

The Doctor wasn't sure if he believed in prayer, but right now he was grateful for the gentle tones of Pastor Rick's voice as he prayed aloud.  Robert had seemed shocked by Rose's disappearance, and the Doctor zoned in on Allison, remembering what Robert said about Rose's attractiveness and how he had looked at her... And how Allison wanted to 'boot her' from the bed and breakfast. 

At the bottom of the stairs, Robert and Allison were talking, Allison's face red and her quiet demeanor gone. This would not be acceptable, and no one in the community would've blamed Robert for disciplining his wife. 

However, the Doctor, being the Doctor, was not about to accept this.  He stepped forward so that the couple was alerted to his presence.  "She's not upstairs," he said, watching the couple for any sign of guilt.  Neither of them showed it on their faces, though Allison continued to wring her fingers.  The Doctor felt his eyes narrow of their own accord, his suspicions rising.

This was exactly why Rassilon didn't want the Time Lords to have feigns like this. It made them dangerous, and the Doctor was the most dangerous of all of them. He'd wiped out his people, and he felt anger stewing in his chest, threatening to explode from every part of him.  He would destroy this entire town to find Rose, and he didn't even have it in him to be frightened with himself, though he probably should've been.

He was calm as he approached the woman, his hands in his pockets and his chin tilted up.  "Where is she?" he asked, his voice low and even. He was very steady, for someone who wanted to flip tables and break vases that would be considered absolutely priceless in about one hundred years.  

"I don't know," Allison said, becoming a bit more gentle in her manner when she saw the look in his face.  The only relief the Doctor found in this was that she would not be beaten by her husband for her behavior later in the night. 

"You wanted to kick her out of the house."  Pastor Rick said softly, "Your husband told us, my dear."

Allison's eyes snapped briefly but she managed to keep it in check, like she was taught, like she was supposed to.  "My _husband_ leers at that woman.  She's almost young enough to be his daughter."

"We're not accusing you of anything, Allison," the Pastor said hurriedly, "But she _is_ missing.  Perhaps we should tell the police she's missing."

The Doctor ran a hand through his hair.  "I'm pretty sure we'd have to wait twenty four hours before they would do anything about it.  She's not 'missing' to them as of yet."

Robert shrugged.  "We've never had a disappearance in this town before.  None of us really know the rules."

"Have you checked with her employer?" Allison asked, actively trying to shift the blame off of her.  The Doctor's attention snapped back to her. 

"He said he doesn't know a thing about where she is.  Seemed very unconcerned, actually," he squinted, "Do any of you know more about him?"

The pastor shook his head.  "He travels a lot for his cases.  He's one of the richest men in the town.  Aside from that, we know little."  He rubbed his eye with two fingers, as though that was going to help him process whatever was happening.  "He attends church, but I'm sure you've noticed his attendance is more staggered."

"Do you think he has something to hide?" The Doctor demanded, looking at the pastor with wide eyes. 

"No, not necessarily," the pastor admitted, "But I don't know enough about him to make that assumption, I suppose."

Allison gave the Doctor an odd look, as though the pieces of the horrific puzzle were falling into place for her.  "How well do you know Miss Tyler, if I may ask?"

"We're very close," The Doctor replied bluntly, "We're from the same place, and we care about each other."

The pastor scratched the back of his neck, resolved to keep his conversations with the Doctor in confidence, but now it was harder for him to keep his mouth shut.  He didn't want to betray confidence and trust, but it was possible that the fact of love would tug at Allison's womanly heartstrings and she would want to be a greater help in their investigation for Rose.

"Well, what are we supposed to do?" Robert groused, throwing his big hands up in a gesture of surrender.  "None of us know where she is and you say that we can't ask the police until tomorrow night.  Where else could we check?"

Rassilon, once again, would have actually made himself useful in this situation.  He was separated from his emotions, which would have served the Doctor well in this situation.  He was thinking about Rose and only Rose, and therefore couldn't be bothered by the presence of the TARDIS in the back of his mind.  She was always there, so he was determined not to think anything of it.  He set his jaw and tried to push her out. He needed more mind space to follow her, to make sure that he could focus on Rose.

She drove him mad, and her disappearance was making him even madder. It was possible that Rose drove him a bit spare regardless.  He rubbed his face in his hands before puling his hands down his cheeks and dropping them at his sides. 

"I don't know," he admitted.

"There is nothing we can do," the Pastor said.  "It would be better if you went to bed, Doctor.  You're too wound up by all this. I know you care about Miss Tyler greatly, but you're no good to her half dead on your feet, trying to look for her."   he glanced around at the other people in the room. "I suggest that we all go and pray for awhile, ask God to bring Miss Tyler back to us, and then we sleep. In the morning we will resume the search."

"Should we tell anyone?" Allison asked. 

The pastor shook his head.  "I'm afraid the people of this town are closed minded and barely accept the Doctor, much less Rose.  I fear that if one of them were to find her while not in the right mindset, she could be in more danger than she is in now.  No.  It must stay between the four of us."

In the back of his mind, the Doctor had to admit that Pastor Rick was right.  He kicked himself.  Maybe she had been careless because he hadn't told her anything about what might happen to them while they were here.  He felt as though he'd done her a tremendous disservice, but of course, there was nothing he could do about it. He just had to wait until tomorrow.

But he wouldn't sleep.  He knew that much.

"Is there anything in her room that could help us?" Robert asked.

"No, you're not going in that hussy's room!" Allison nearly shouted, drawing shocked gazes from the three men in the room.

The Doctor felt a fresh rage brewing in him at the attack on Rose's honor.  He clenched and unclenched his fists, trying to dis-spell some of the tension in his body.  The others noticed him and fell silent.

"How _dare_ you," he said softly, "Rose is a fine woman of high standing, and is not a _hussy._ You call yourself a woman of God and you use language like that."

"The Doctor is quite right, Allison. I've met Miss Tyler, as have you, and you know that she is a kind and gentle spirit. I shuddder to think what would happen if we were to find out that something happened to her and you had said those words about her."

The pastor seemed to be the peacemaker in the situation that was rapidly coming to a head before him. He held up his hand, silencing his own thoughts.  "I feel your tension, Doctor, and nothing good will come of it.  You know this."

He nodded. Of course, the Doctor knew what sorts of emotions came from anger and fear and he was not willing to relive them. But he was also not willing to lose Rose.  She was the most precious thing in his life, and if she was lost, than so was he. He couldn't live without her, even if he pretended that he could. 

He couldn't stay away from her.  He'd tried to, in France, tried to push her away, and ended up hurting other people in the process.  He couldn't do that again, couldn't push her until her heart broke.  He wanted to treat her with care, to love her, and he knew he didn't deserve that. 

But that didn't mean that she didn't deserve the right to choose.

He blew out his cheeks, sighing heavily, and put his head in his hands. "You're right," he said, before lifting up, standing straight. "We're no good to her hysterical."

No one called him out on the fact that he was the only one that was hysterical, which he actually appreciated greatly. 

He trudged upstairs, his hearts wavering in his chest. He felt as lost as Rose was physically.  She could be in any state, and he wouldn't know. That was what he feared most.  Even when he wasn't with Rose, for the most part, he knew exactly where she was or at the very least, who she was with.  It was unnerving to not know.  

He wanted to run back out of the house to search for her, but he couldn't do that, at least, not until Allison and Robert went to sleep. And it didn't' seem like that was going to happen for awhile, as he could hear them shouting in the floor above him.  

"She's just some woman, Allison!" Robert shouted, "Now shut up!" 

"No, I won't shut up!  I won't stay still, I won't stand for this!" She was angry, of course, she was, and the Doctor winced, knowing what would happen if she continued on.  

But she was on the warpath. "You say that you're trying to fix us, trying not to look at other women, and then you find out your favorite little whore is missing and you-"

There it was.  The sound of palm on cheek.  A warning.  The room above him fell silent, painfully silent, and Robert spoke, so lowly that the Doctor would not have been able to hear if he hadn't been a Time Lord. 

"She is a _person._ Yes, she is attractive, but I meant it when I said I was trying to save our marriage, but you're destroying it all over again!"

The Doctor closed his eyes.  They never should've come here.  They should've just sat in the TARDIS and waited for the part to crop up. They would be bored, yes, but they would've been safe, and none of this would have happened. 

There were few things that the Doctor regretted in his life.  Now, this was one of them.  He didn't want Rose to be in danger, more than anything, but that was all he ever did to her, wasn't it?  Put her in danger, let her laugh it off, or force her to, and then drag her into the next adventure before she had time to weep or mourn or _breathe._ She deserved better than him.

But he was too selfish to let her go. 

He already felt lost.  Rose was a source of comfort and affection that he hadn't had in a long time.  If she wasn't here in the morning, in the town, in the building, he wasn't sure what he would do.  Panic would set in once more, he was sure. 

The Doctor snuck out when the noise in the floor above him quieted and he assumed that the couple was asleep.  He crept out into the empty town. The lights were off and it was nearly hopeless to see anything, but he had one place he wanted to examine.

It was a bit illegal, of course, to just go traipsing into Mr. Taylor's office, but the Doctor was far past any sort of propriety.  After all, it wasn't like the man would be there.  He peered around, making sure no one was on the streets, and pulled his sonic from his pocket.

Quiet and fast as the night around him, he disappeared into the building.


	11. Chapter 11

Mr. Taylor's office was quiet around the Doctor, but the Doctor barely noticed. He only wanted to find anything that would lead him to Rose.  

Nothing of hers was there, which was his first concern.  Whether Rose had taken it all with her or Mr. Taylor had hid it, he didn't know. He was nearly scandalized by his own thoughts.  He didn't know enough about Mr. Taylor to accuse him of anything, but he knew enough about Rose to know that she wouldn't just disappear without telling him where she'd gone. 

She...  She _would_ tell him, wouldn't she?  Of course, she'd been standoffish at best with him over the past days.  He sat down at the desk that belonged to her and leaned on his elbow.  She wouldn't do that, make him worry, not on purpose. 

Unless, of course, there was a reason that she hadn't told him, and she was still alive.  He blew out a sigh.  That was all he needed, to know that she was still alive.  Half finished notes laid out on her desk and he breathed out a sigh.  She'd typed these with her own delicate hands, waiting for him to come pick her up.  

Had she even waited?  Had she wanted him to come pick her up at all?  He stood up abruptly, and ran his hands through his hair.  She still cared about him, didn't' she?  She hadn't been meeting up with someone behind his back and was... Sneaking out? Oh.  Maybe she'd just run away. 

Oh, no, that was bad, bad, bad. A life without Rose Tyler because she stayed with him forever was one thing.  A life without Rose Tyler because she finally realized she was too good for him was something that took the breath from him. 

He'd get in trouble for being found in the lawyer's office, but he couldn't be bothered to do anything else about it.  Fueled by rage at himself and Rose for no reason, he darted into Mr. Taylor's office and immediately narrowed his eyes. 

The whole room was positively immaculate.  Not a book out of place, a paper unparallel to the surface of the desk. It made him nearly sick to look at, and he knew he couldn't mess anything up. If something was touched, Mr. Taylor would know about it.  He swore under his breath.  That was the problem.  He could do nothing now.  Rose was messy and that had made looking at her desk easy.  This wasn't easy.

The Doctor was not a fan of giving up, and he never had been, but this seemed to be the moment that he had to give up.  He couldn't risk Rose (wherever she was) because he was worried about her.  

He shut the door to Mr. Taylor's office and stormed from the place, livid.  He was stewing in his own skin and wanted to punch something or someone.  He could feel the TARDIS humming urgently in the back of his head, but he wasn't thinking clearly enough to let her in.  He felt his blood pressure and temperature rise as he slammed up walls, mental guards that would keep her from getting into his mind. 

She'd been annoying him since this evening, trying to get into his mind, and he didn't _need_ that.  He was already worrying completely violently about Rose, he didn't need to worry about his time ship either. She'd be fine.  No one could get through those doors unless she wanted them to.  So it was all fine.  The only thing she was doing was distracting him, and he was one hundred percent focused on Rose. 

He stormed through the streets back to the bed and breakfast, where he had to tone down his anger so he could creep quietly into the house and get into his room.  He passed Rose's room with a wince of guilt and let himself into his room with a mouthful of regret.  He hadn't figured out anything. He was useless to Rose. 

He was always useless to Rose, always putting her in second place to other things. He resolved, that when he found her, he would fix things.  He would fix _them._ He didn't know what else to do.  All he knew was how to fix, because that was what 'the Doctor', the persona he had chosen after the Time War, did.  And it hurt him that he couldn't fix Rose's problems when she had fixed him over and over again. 

She was so important.  His hearts swelled in his chest as he thought about her, leaning against the bed until he fell onto it.  He kicked off his shoes and crawled into the bed, shucking his jacket and tie along the way.  He suddenly felt so tired.  He needed her. 

"Rose," her name slipped past his lips on accident, it was never meant to happen.  He was never meant to be like this, the Time Lords would absolutely despise him.  It was base, it was beneath him.  On the food chain, on any scale, he was higher up than her.  She was meant to be below him, and he depended on her. 

It never occurred to him, that one day she wouldn't be there for him. He brushed her off, assuming she would always be there as he held her at arm's length, but he never considered the fact that perhaps if he was not there for her, as the best mate he said he was, she would not be there for him.

He closed his eyes, heaving out a shuddering sigh, withing she were in the building so that he could feel safer about the whole situation.  He clenched his fists into the sheets, trying to work out stress and anger without doing anything he would regret.  It wouldn't do to destroy something that his hosts had purchased, especially so soon after America's Great Depression.  That was ridiculous.  Ridiculous of him to destroy things, that was.

He could finally admit it to himself, in the dark of the night, with no one to hear him or shame him for his words. 

Into the quiet room was the whisper he wasn't even sure came from himself. "I love her."

****

_"Rose!  Rose!"_

_"I'm here, Doctor!  Come for me, come to the TARDIS!"_

_"I can't, I don't know where you are."_

_"Come to me, my Doctor."_

_"I'm lost."_

_"The TARDIS!  The TARDIS, Doctor!"_

_"You're gone, you're gone, you're gone," His hands in his hair, tearing at it, making her wince._

_She cried out, "Dance with me!  Come here!"_

_"No.  No, I won't dance with you."_

_"Then_ find _me, and take me home!"_

_"No."_

_"Doctor!"_

Rose sat up in bed, panting and sweating. She'd been having the same dream all night, that she'd been trying to get to the Doctor, to tell him to come to her, but he couldn't understand.  It wasn't that he didn't want to.  But he couldn't find her.

In her dream, he looked dazed and afraid, as afraid as she had been when Mr. Taylor had tried to attack her.  She had wanted to take him into her arms, to tell him that she was alright, that he didn't need to worry, but he didn't seem to understand. 

She wondered if the TARDIS had something to do with her dreams at all.  She put her face in her hands and groaned into her palms, trying not to panic.  This was a lot for her body to handle.  It was hard for her to be apart from him, locked in her own home. 

The TARDIS hummed softly, the only sound that she ever made, the tone the only thing that changed, but this was a consistent hum. The hum that lulled her to sleep every night.  It was comforting her now, and she blew out her cheeks.  Her heart was still hammering wildly in her chest and she couldn't calm it down.  

"You'll let me out after tomorrow?" She asked, looking up at the ceiling. 

The hum changed, to a happy affirmative. 

Rose looked down and played with a loose thread on her duvet.  "I kind of miss him already," she admitted, "Even though he does a lot of stupid things."

The TARDIS agreed, and Rose felt her hearty agreement.  She giggled at it, continuing to pick at the thread.  

"I'm scared for him," she whispered.  "But maybe I need to go home," she said softly, daring to raise her voice just slightly.  "He doesn't want me here."

The TARDIS screeched and Rose flopped down on the bed, curling into the pillows. 

"Oh, don't lecture me!" Rose snapped.  "He doesn't, and why would he?  He's a bloody _Time Lord,_ he's too good for me."

More angry, low humming.  Rose bit back tears, knowing that the TARDIS was on her side.  But unfortunately, the Doctor wasn't on either of their sides. He just wanted to travel around and have a hand to hold.  She was just lucky that it happened to be her hand.  But it could've been anyone's.  She wasn't special.

She closed her eyes. "Can I sleep now, please?" She asked.  She smiled up at the ship.  "It's good to be home, though," she said softly.

The TARDIS returned to her normal hum and Rose laid back in bed, finally able to fall asleep, with no dreams.  

****

The next morning, Pastor Rick didn't even worry about anything that he had planned for the Doctor to do that day.  He knew that he would be stressed, and he had prayed all night, hoping to bring Rose back.  Of course, he was aware that God didn't always answer prayers, so he was resigned when the Doctor strode in, looking exhausted and rumpled.

"This is awful," he said miserably. "I need to find her."

"I have faith that Rose will return," the Pastor said simply, "I think it would be best for you to focus on your work, my son.  She would want it."

The Doctor looked at the pastor helplessly. "Do you really think she'll come back?"  He was so far past his logical thinking that he wanted nothing more than to weep until Rose reappeared in his life to console him.  

Pastor Rick smiled softly.  "Yes," he said, "The Lord works in mysterious ways, Doctor.  There are some verses I want you to read, they're all laid out on your desk.  Your internship will last for another week or so.  I was alerted by your supervisor in London."

Oh.  The Doctor knew what that meant.  It meant that the TARDIS had sent something out (being that she was sentient and _brilliant)_ and therefore, the part he needed was going to be coming up soon.  That alone raised a question.  

If the part appeared and Rose hadn't, what was he going to do?  He couldn't leave not knowing if she was alive or dead.  He also couldn't live in the 1950s, now, could he?  He blinked, trying to focus in on the conversation at hand.  "But... Miss Tyler," he whispered. 

Pastor Rick nodded.  "If you wish to stay for longer, you certainly can. I'm not going to turn you away in your time of need.  But, may I ask you something?"  His tone was cautious, as though he was about to ask a loaded question, which the Doctor realized he mostly was.

The Doctor made a noise of assent before nodding, himself.  He would answer, even if it bothered him.  He was still going for full immersion, after all, and that would mean submission to those above him.  In this case, that was the Pastor, who he respected greatly anyway.

"What will you do if she does not return?"  Pastor Rick asked it gently, but the Doctor felt unbidden tears lurch into his throat with the very thought.  He pursed his lips, afraid of the words that may or may not come tumbling out of his mouth. 

He hung his head and shrugged before looking back up, putting his emotions firmly back in check, where they had remained for _so_ long before Rose. He knew exactly what he would do if Rose was gone forever.  He'd had plenty of time to think about it, plenty of long nights while she was sleeping to _dwell._ To sit over coffee and imagine that she wasn't going to come to him the next morning, smiling and putting the kettle on for tea.  He inhaled sharply and leveled his eyes with the Pastor's, deciding that for once in his life, his very _long_ life, he was going to be honest.

 "I will break."


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so there is going to be one more chapter after this one for more fluff and tying loose ends. 
> 
> Enjoy this one :)

The appropriate time had finally passed.  At the same moment the Doctor left the bed and breakfast, the TARDIS let him know via the device in his room that the part was ready.  This was all part of her plan, of course, for she was a very clever ship and was not about to be outsmarted by her stupid owners.  Because, really, they were rather daft.

As the Doctor had (for some reason) expected, the police found no trace of Rose.  For some reason, the thought didn't send him into a panic.  Because it meant that there was a chance she was alive, if no body was found.  He held his breath whenever a report came from the police, but the report was always _No news on Rose Tyler._

No news on Rose Tyler.  It had become his mantra.  It was good, good.  No news was good news, right?  Or, that was the saying, after all.  He wasn't sure he believed in it until now, though.  Something about his faith in Rose may have been the cause for that.

The Doctor had been moping, and anyone who interacted with him in town knew it. They all whispered about him, wondering why the disappearance of Rose Tyler had gotten him all worked up.  He was oblivious to all this, just wandering around, plodding through life without saying a word.

He went into the church and locked himself in his office after a brief greeting to Pastor Rick, who had suggested he write a fake sermon just to practice.  He had been pouring over all the appropriate texts and references, and had to admit that it was a very good way to keep his mind off of what had happened.  

Of course, his mind did not stray from it totally.  He thought of Rose in nearly everything he did, and he wondered if this was what true grief was like, and that perhaps he had never truly experienced it before. Or perhaps it was just that this was fresh, that he remembered holding her hand and he regretted the way he had been with her while on this trip.  

He had been horrible to her.  He had made her feel isolated because he hadn't _danced_ with her.  It would've been one swing around the dance floor, that had been all she wanted, and that was what set into motion her being driven away from him., 

It was almost a need, the ache he had to have her back in his life.  She was gone. He slipped his pair of glasses on and looked back down at his notes.  It would do him no good to fixate now.

****

The TARDIS woke Rose up with a happy hum, knowing that her wolf would be happy as well to get back to the Doctor.  Rose woke up with a big stretch and yawn, covering her face with one hand.

"Good morning," She mumbled, before turning over onto her stomach.  "So I take it Mr. Taylor isn't going to kill me now?" She asked sleepily.

The ship gave a hum that Rose was sort of able to translate to "Well, he can _try,"_ and Rose smiled, not opening her eyes.  She'd never been good at getting out of bed, and that wasn't news.  The Doctor had had to bound into her room many a time to get her up to come see the wonder that he'd parked them outside (and sometimes he'd even get them right) and it was that thought of the Doctor that made her sit up. 

She looked down at the foot of her bed and saw that the TARDIS had laid out the same outfit she'd been wearing when she went 'missing', only with a few dirt stains on the skirt and a smear on the blouse.  She supposed that made sense.  She couldn't just show up clean and fresh back at the town.  She would have to look weathered. 

Rolling out of bed, she got changed back into her clothes, deciding to leave her hair down because maybe it would make sense for her ponytail to be ripped out when she ran away.  She slipped her shoes on and looked at herself in the mirror.  She looked a little bedraggled, _almost_ like she'd been out for two days.  

It made her stop and wonder what the Doctor made of all this.  The TARDIS was supposed to tell him what was wrong.  Would he be angry with her?  She hoped he wouldn't be.  She wrung her hands nervously; she didn't want him to be even more upset with her.  It was already a deep seated fear of hers that he was going to send her home for throwing herself at him.

The TARDIS made a little sound of encouragement and Rose smiled.  It was time to go. How she'd get through the town unnoticed, she didn't know, but she'd get going straight to the church.  She wasn't sure if he would even be there, but that was her hope.  That was all she needed, was to find the Doctor, and find him first. 

Even so, she'd run into other people along the way, and she hoped she wouldn't find Mr. Taylor.  He scared her, more than she cared to admit, because her favorite part of herself was that she was nearly fearless.  She could handle aliens and heights and adventure but a man who was a little stronger than her scared her to death. 

Shaking those thoughts from her head, she walked through the TARDIS, heading for the console room.  "So you're gonna give him all the stuff he needs, yeah?  The part's come up?" She asked, tilting her head towards the ceiling.  She didn't think that was really necessary, but it made her feel closer to the ship. Well, as close as one can be to a ship, that is.  Rose patted one of the coral walls before heading to the door, which was no longer barred.  

Opening the door made her squint, as natural light seemed so much sharper than any other light that she had come into contact with over the past couple of days.  For good measure, she pulled her cardigan so it looked stretched and worn and plodded back to town. 

She felt wide awake, but knew she had to pretend otherwise.  So she slumped her shoulders and trudged into the town, trying to catch the church as fast as she could.  People in the town looked at her, their eyes wide, and they whispered, but no one seemed to want to talk to her.  She looked down.  They were still suspicious of her, even after all this, but the _Doctor,_ no, he was fine, no sense wasting their time suspecting him.  She walked through the town, avoiding all eye contact, and only stopped when she heard someone call out her name.

"Rose!"  Allison was running towards her, her arms full of groceries.

Rose blinked and looked to the other woman, forcing a smile.  "Hi," she said.  

"Oh, everyone's been so worried!  Us especially, of course, Robert and I, that is," she wasn't sure why, but Allison touched her cheek as she spoke of Robert. 

"Right, yeah.  I kind of just want to go see the Doctor, if that's okay," Rose said, shifting awkwardly back and forth.  

"Oh, of course, can I walk you to the church?"

"Sure," Rose replied, knowing it would be strange to refuse such a kind offer. 

"I can go to the police and tell them you're alright, if you'd like?" Allison said, "I don't want the Doctor to have to do it, he was so torn up when you went missing."

Rose scratched the back of her head, confused, but not wanting to admit that she was such.  "Right," she said, "Yeah, that would actually be great.  It think I'm leaving soon anyway... I don't want to have to talk to the police."

"Of course," Allison said sympathetically.  "But I'll have a hot meal waiting for you tonight, I promise."  

"Thanks," Rose said, smiling tightly.

They were silent for a few moments, and Rose endured a few more stares and whispers, hands cupped over mouths to keep her from reading their lips. It was embarrassing and she squeezed her eyes shut tight at the feeling.  This was awful.  She wanted to go home, back to the TARDIS, back to the stars. 

"Pardon me, but... Where did you go?"

Rose snorted and turned to Allison.  "Mr. Allen Taylor tried to kill me. He accused me of being a communist," she said harshly, "Which I can assure you, I'm not, the British people as a whole are not _communist,"_ she knew she was raising her voice and didn't care.  "So for anyone to think that we could even be suspected of being spies for a communist nation we're not a part of is ridiculous!  So I ran.  But I needed to... I had no where else to go.  I needed to see the Doctor."

"I believe you," Allison said softly, searching Rose's eyes.  She gestured towards the building in front of them with her chin, as her arms were full.  "Right there, my dear."

Rose sighed. "Sorry. I didn't mean to... Sorry.  Thank you."

"Of course," Allison smiled warmly.  "I'll see you later tonight."

"Yeah," Rose replied, nodding, confirming that she would indeed be back that night.  She turned from Allison and walked towards the front doors of the church, her hands shaking slightly with anticipation.  She wasn't sure what his reaction would be and she wasn't even sure that she wanted to know, if she was honest.  She wiped her sweaty palms off on her skirt and opened the front doors to the church. 

Pastor Rick was in the sanctuary, running through his sermon.  His hands were in mid-gesture when she peeked in.  He smiled widely and tilted his head up, drawing his hands together, clasping them.  "Thank you, Lord," he whispered, and ran to her, holding his hand out to her.  She took it and smiled weakly.

"I wanna see the Doctor," she said softly, hoping she was sounding as meek as she was trying for. 

"Of course," Pastor Rick said.  "Oh, he has been aching for you, my child, you must go to him."

Rose felt her eyes well up with tears at the very notion. "Thank you, Pastor," she said.  

"I won't ask for your story my dear, for you may not want to tell it.  But know all is well now."

Rose felt her jaw set.  "I'm sure it will be common knowledge soon enough.  Where's the Doctor?"

"He's in his office."

He directed her there and she nodded, walking towards the office.  The door was shut and she accepted that he had probably locked it before she knocked on it softly, trying to be delicate.

"Come in," his voice sounded tired and she was surprised to find that he really didn't' lock the door.  She frowned and turned the knob, creeping in and shutting the door behind her, pressing her back against it, her hands behind her.

The Doctor looked up, his glasses perched on his face, and in one moment, she was able to find that he looked so tired and worn that she just wanted to hug him until neither of them could breathe.  

"Rose," he breathed, his voice strangled.  "Oh, Rose."  He scrambled to his feet, pushing some of his papers around, and came around his desk, pulling her into his arms.  It was the most contact she'd had with him in so long that she let her eyes flutter shut and she threw her arms around his neck, holding him against her as he tucked his face into the side of her neck, his breath fast and rough, as though he'd been running a marathon. 

She pressed a kiss to his temple, trying to comfort him. "The TARDIS didn't-"

He didn't let her finish. He pulled back from her and cupped her cheek with one hand, the other still firmly wrapped around her waist.  He leaned down and kissed her, hard, not letting her have room to breathe or move.  He wasn't idle, didn't let her adjust, and she was more than happy to hold on for the ride.  She ran her hands into his hair and curled her fingers, kissing him, letting him in as far as he wanted to go. 

His tongue traced her lip, silently begging entrance that she was all too willing to give.  She opened up and he kissed her deeply for several moments before pulling back with a noisy pop.  His eyes were shining with tears and he whispered words that she wished she could hear for the rest of her life.

"I love you."


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! The final chapter! I've thought about a sequel to this but i'm not sure.
> 
> Regardless: enjoy! Thank you for the love

Rose blinked, panting a little despite herself, and stared at him.  "You... You what?"

"I love you," he repeated, with conviction, his hands moving to grip her shoulders.  He was not backing down, not running from her.  Quite the opposite, actually, this was quite like he was running _to_ her.  

She cupped his cheeks, searching his eyes.  "Doctor, the TARDIS-"

He seemed to want to keep cutting her off, because he kissed her again, slowly, tenderly, as though he couldn't get close enough to her.  He wrapped his arms around her again, tucking her gently against himself.  Her hands slid down to his chest, feeling the rapid double beat of his hearts thunder against her palms.  She curled her fingers into the fabric of his clothes, unable to stop herself. 

The words he had just given her meant so much, and she almost didn't want to spoil the moment with the truth. It was obvious that he didn't know what had actually happened to her, that the TARDIS either hadn't told him or hadn't been able to.  

So she let him kiss her and kissed him back, pouring all of her heart into the kiss, hoping to prove to him how much she loved him back, needed him in her life, was lost without him.  His fingers gripped the back of her cardigan in an almost painful motion, gripping her close as though she was about to slip between his fingertips.   

She wasn't, though, she planned to stay, and tried to tell him with her touch, with the movement of her fingers through his hair or across his cheek.  He whimpered softly into her mouth and pulled back slightly, breathing heavily, even with his respiratory bypass system.  His eyes were closed, and he seemed to be drastically affected. 

Her heart tugged for him and she brought him into a hug, one less crushing than the first, when they had been reunited.  His breathing was still ragged and she let her eyes flutter shut as she tipped her head against his. 

"I'm okay," she promised.  

"Say it," he said, barely above a whisper, as though he hadn't heard her words at all.

"Doctor?"

"Please say it," he begged. 

He seemed so lost, and it was at that moment that Rose thought perhaps she hadn't known him as well as she thought she did.  He loved her, he had been _lost_ without her, and this was proving it.  

She pressed a kiss to his hair, unable to deny him in the face of something like this, especially when he meant so much to her.  

"I love you," she whispered softly, like a secret, giving the words to him like she'd never given them to anybody else, like she hadn't given them in over a year.  Mickey had told her he'd loved her and she'd just said "Bye" because those words didn't belong to him anymore. 

She still loved Mickey.  But he wasn't the Doctor.  He didn't love her like she had always known that the Doctor had.  

The held each other for a long while, and Rose stroked her hands through his hair, trying to calm or soothe him, somehow.  She let him breathe heavily against her neck for awhile until she gently eased him back so she could look at him. 

"I love you," she told him again.  He smiled, his face lighting up with the sort of expression she hadn't seen in so long.  

"I love you," he repeated, in the same tone. 

She stroked her thumbs over his cheeks.  "If I tell you... You're not going to change your mind about that, are you?" 

He shook his head, looking rather adamant about the whole thing.  "No, I could never, Rose.  I can't push you away anymore, not like I have since we first met.  You're really just-" he blew out a long breath.  

"I was in the TARDIS," Rose said softly, smiling a little.  "She said she was going to tell you."

He blushed a little and looked away from her. "She... She was trying to get my attention, but I wouldn't... I wasn't listening to her.  I was so fixated on you that I couldn't think to let her in."

"You didn't think that would be the solution to the problem?" Rose asked softly.

"No, but..." He furrowed his brows at her. "Why did you stay in the TARDIS for two days and give me a panic attack?"

She dropped her hands, smoothing them along his arms.  "Yeah... So, Mr. Taylor invited me out to lunch-"

He stepped away from her as though she'd burned him.  She reached for him again, grabbing his hands.  "No, it's not like that," She said, shaking her head.  "I just, you were making me so _frustrated,_ and I thought, oh, he seems like an alright bloke, so I said yes.  And then he took me out in this field and tried to kill me-"

"What?!" His hands were on her again, looking for any sort of damage that might have come to her person.  "He tried to _what?"_

Rose shrugged.  "He thought I was a communist," she said softly, "So I ran to the TARDIS, and she was hidden, so he didn't find it.  So she made me stay in there, locking up the door so I couldn't get out.  I tried to get back to you, but I couldn't do it, she wouldn't let me out."

The Doctor studied her and opened and closed his mouth several times before saying, "I'm sorry."

She furrowed her brows.  "Why are you sorry?"

"Because.. If I'd danced with you, that first night, you wouldn't have thought that you needed to go out to lunch with someone else."  His voice trailed off at the end, as though he hadn't meant to say 'someone else' but he'd already confessed that he loved her, so there really wasn't any sort of thing to hide.  

She wrung her hands, since he was farther away from her than he had been originally.  "I wanted you to dance with me," she said softly.  "I did.  But you didn't want to, and I wasn't about to force you."

"I did want to," he replied firmly, stepping forward.  "But I couldn't.  I had all these hang ups, Time Lord rules, all that... Mess," he finished weakly, "But I want to change that," he said.

She cocked her head.  "What changed?" She asked softly, "What makes things different?"

"When you meant missing, all I could think about was how much I'd held back because I thought it would hurt me too much if we were involved and you left... Or were taken.  But then, when I was faced with the reality of you being gone, really, it made me realize that if I could have you in the way that I was certain we both want, than that was what I wanted."  He blinked back tears and she nearly wept with his honesty.  "I thought I lost you."

She shook her head.  "You're not gonna lose me," she whispered, and jumped into his arms.  He lifted her up and spun her around the office once before setting her back down and kissing her, smiling now, his eyes dancing like she was so used to.  

"The part's come up today, too," she said breathlessly, "That's why the TARDIS let me out."

The Doctor smiled.  "You're so clever," he gushed, and Rose found her cheeks coloring.  He grabbed her around the waist and hauled her up against himself.  He kissed her cheeks and forehead.  "You beautiful, precious girl."

She held onto his shoulders for dear life, unable to think at all.  She blinked and gripped his jacket and let him kiss his way down her neck, biting at the base of her throat.

"You can't leave any marks on me," she thumped him playfully on the back.  "The townspeople will be terrorized."

"Good," he replied, but she wrenched herself from him.  She cocked a brow at him and tilted her chin, waiting for him to follow the request that she wordlessly asked for.  

He leaned down and captured her lips without hesitation, his hands skimming over her waist in a movement so gentle that it would've made Rose weep were she not so focused on everything else that he was doing to her.  

She ran her hands up into his hair and after a few moments pulled away, and he pressed his forehead against hers, as though he couldn't get close enough to her. 

"Stay with me until I have to leave," he said softly, "I can't be without you anymore."

She nodded slightly.  "Okay," She whispered, trying to match his tone, although without the intensity.  She realized that she needed to calm him down.  She looked into his eyes and smiled softly, hoping to get him even calmer.  "I'll stay."

Because he didn't have a chair, she had to sit perched on his knee, or fully on his lap, or pacing around.  She was bored, monumentally bored, but when he'd look up from his work to stare at her in alarm, as though she disappeared because he hadn't been looking at her.   Every time he did it she offered a reassuring smile. 

After Pastor Rick gave them blessings and the Doctor said that he was going to leave early.  He cornered the Doctor and made Rose step out of the room. 

"Do you plan to marry her, Doctor?" Pastor Rick asked, "Since you're a man of the cloth now, and you'll be taking a woman back to London."

The Doctor was about to stutter and say that of _course_ he wasn't going to marry her, that would be ridiculous.  But as he opened his mouth to say all that things, but closed it again.  He finally, for he first time, said what he was thinking.  "Yes," he said softly, barely able to voice it. "I want to marry her."

The Pastor shook his hand, a wide smile on his face.  "I always thought there was something special between the two of you," he admitted.  "It'll be a good marriage.  The two of you seem to understand each other better than anybody else I have met in a long time.  I wish you happiness."

"Thank you.  Please don't tell everyone we've gone until... After we're gone."

"As you wish.  God bless you, my son."

"And you, Pastor Rick," The Doctor found that he was actually going to miss him. He'd been a good mentor and friend to him.  He smiled and turned to return to Rose, lacing their fingers together in the most familiar way.

The part lay in the field, looking organic and green.  It was bigger than Rose had expected and they hauled it back to the TARDIS with minimal grunting and panting.

"What about our stuff?"  Rose asked once they were on board and the Doctor lifted a piece of the grating, jumping inside to look through things. 

"The TARDIS will bring it back, don't worry," the Doctor replied confidently.  "She'll return it all back to the wardrobe room, good as new."  He smiled up at her and she grinned back, unable to help herself. 

She helped him put the part back, tripping over her skirt several times along the way and giggling with him about it, until finally the TARDIS could travel again. They both stood by the console, looking up at the time rotor.

"I want you to marry me," the Doctor blurted out. 

Rose turned to him, shocked, and unable to think of what she could have possibly done to instill that sort of reaction in him.  She opened and closed her mouth.  "What?"  

He blushed. "I don't want to be without you anymore," he said softly, stepping forward to take her hands. "I know that I haven't exactly courted you, but I'd like to, in the Time Lord way.  And marry you in the ways of Earth."

Rose was still in a bit of shock, her heart pumping with those words coming from the Doctor. "You really want that?" She asked.

He nodded. "I want to give myself to you, never make you feel the way you did on this trip.  You are the one person I can't live without, Rose.  I need you.  Please say you'll marry me?"

She beamed.  "Yes," she said softly.  "Yes!"

He swept her up and squeezed her around the waist, and she could feel his smile against her skin.   

"Where to next, my love?" He asked, looking down into her eyes.  

"With you?" She asked, and reached for the lever that she knew sent them into the Vortex. 

"Anywhere."


End file.
